Fem! Romano's Blog
by Stardust98
Summary: Hey bastards . . . My boss told me to do a stupid, damn blog. A bunch of other nations are doing the same thing, so he told me to do one. Just don't ask stupid questions . . . or I'll freaking kill you. Send in comments/questions by PM please! Rated M for language and other stuff. Inspired by Red-Tulips-Are-Awesome's blogs.
1. Introduction

**Hey bastards . . . My boss told me to do a fucking blog. A bunch of other nations are doing the same thing, so he told me to do one. Fan-fucking-tastic. Let me just fill out the damn form and get this shit over with.**

**Name:** South Italy/Romana-Lovina Vargas

**Gender: **Female.

**Status: **. . . Single. **((Uh-huh. Sure.))**

**Married/Lover/Dating: **What the hell?! I thought I already answered this in the last question! N-NO! AND ESPECIALLY** NOT** TO SPAIN, D-DAMMIT!

**Age:** I'm in my 20's.

**Birthday: **March 17th.

**Hair Color: **Brown.

**Eye Color: **Green. (Maybe this isn't so bad . . .)

**Height:** 5'4" I'M NOT SHORT. SCREW YOU.

**Weight: **Fuck you.

**Breast Size (Only if female.): **Who the hell came up with these questions?! I will castrate you and bury you alive.

**Likes: **Tomatoes, pasta, sweets.

**Dislikes:** Germans, perverts, men, idiots, Spain, Germany, France, Prussia and a lot more stuff. (And people.)

**Mood: **Irritated.

**All right, I'm fucking done.**

**DON'T BRING UP ANYTHING ABOUT SPAIN OR I WILL FUCKING THROW YOU AT A WALL.**

**Any comments, bastards?**

* * *

**(('Sup, everyone! This is Lovina's blog! Ignore her threat about Spain. She really doesn't mean it. Just don't tell her I'm a Spamano fan. It's too early for me to die. Go ahead and comment~! _KEEP THE QUESTIONS AT PG-15, PLEASE._))**


	2. Chapter 1: The Damn Comments

**Ciao, bastards. Feli keeps on whining about how I won't let her visit the potato bastard. It's like she WANTS to get raped. Or molested. What does she even see in him anyway? He's annoying as hell. Anyway, Spain came ov- I mean, the tomato bastard came over. Fucking idiot. N-NOTHING HAPPENED B-BY THE WAY. He just brought me tomatoes. THAT'S I-IT.**

**Ve~ But Sorella, I heard noises coming from the bedroom!**

**SHUT THE HELL UP FELI.**

**Time: **1:05 PM

**Currently Listening To: **Feli's annoying whining.

**Mood: **Pissed.

**Subject: **The Fucking Comments

Alright, let's answer the damn comments.

* * *

_**Comment from- Greece's kitty:**_

**me: hi lovina!  
2p romano:OMG I WANNA DO A BLOG!  
me:*slaps him*shut up. anyway what do you think of the 2p characters? and one important question...ARE YOU AND SPAIN DATING!? oh any you can't kill me. *points at italy, romano and 2p romano* THEY ARE MY SHIELDS! and 2p italy says 'WHERES MY FUCKING PASTA'! isn't he nice?**

* * *

_Ciao._ I think t-they are fucking creepy, and stupid. They c-can go screw themselves. **((She's just trying to be brave.))** My opposite's 2p version is fucking stupid.

NO, ME AND THAT TOMATO BASTARD ARE **NOT, I REPEAT, NOT FUCKING DATING! **I WOULD NEVER, EVER DATE SOMEONE THAT F*CKING IDIOTIC OR IRRITATING. I DON'T LIKE THAT IDIOT. **I DON'T LIKE HIM, DAMMIT! **WHY WOULD YOU ASK ME THAT! I-I don't l-like him . . . THAT WAS A TERRIBLE QUESTION. DON'T ASK IT AGAIN . . . . JUST . . . NO.

Tell him I said he can go get it his fucking self.

* * *

_**Comment from- Mossstripes:**_

**Hey Lovina,**

**Ciao! :) I am from America! (problem?) I have a friend whose from Italy (south) and she wanted to tell you to "leave my Deutschland alone tomata bastardo!" Also: I want you to get Felicia please? I'm not a pedo or a pervert :p**

**Averrderci(spelling)**  
**Moss :)**

* * *

_Ciao_. Why the hell would your friend like that Potato Bastard?! And YOUR friend is the tomato bastard! Not me! He makes me wanna fucking barf. And no, I will never leave that damn German bastard alone. He is trying to rape Veneziana. You want me to get my stupid Sorella? Hell no! Feli get- HBUIEFBCW#%e$EN

**((Feli got on the computer.))**

Hello~ What can I do ya for~? Want some pasta? Ignore my sister! She doesn't really mean it!

* * *

_**Comment from-Vampchick2010:**_

**1. Why do you hate Germany do much? He really isn't that bad of a guy.**

**2. How do you honestly feel about Spain? (love or hate? ****Honestly please).**

**3. Penso che sia fantastico che si tenta così difficile essere coraggiosi. Scommetto che ci vuole un sacco di fatica. ****Come si fa a essere così coraggioso per tutto il tempo? ****(I think that it is awesome that you try so hard to be brave. I bet it takes a lot of effort. How do you manage to be so brave all the time?) (i used google translate for this so it may not be accurate.)**

**4. Just so you know. You are higher on my list of favorites than Italy.**

* * *

1) _Ciao_. I hate that damn potato bastard because he's trying to rape my Sorella. What do you mean he's not that bad? Of course he is!

2) I . . . I . . . Spain . . . I can't answer this question.

3) _Grazie_. When you're around a bunch of idiots, you realize they are too stupid to hurt you. If you be brave, they won't fucking mess with you. People still mess with me, but they tend to try to avoid to do that. I must admit . . . it does take a lot of damn work . . .

4) _Grazie_ . . . That means a lot to me . . . **((She's happy.))**

* * *

**((Alright! Thank you for your comments~! Keep sending them in! Keep sending in those questions about Spain~!))**


	3. Chapter 2: Potato Bastard D:

_**Ciao**_**, bastards. I'm fucking pissed right now. That stupid macho potato is coming over later. **_**Gesu Cristo**_**, if I see him one more time, I think I'm going to die. He makes me sick. Felicia is being annoying as always. She's whining about how the house needs to be perfect and all that shit. Whatever. Ugh, I need to leave before he gets here. Hmm . . . maybe I could ask that tomato bastard if I can stay over for a while. Just until the stupid German leaves. I just hope it stops raining until then.**

* * *

**Time: **4:00 PM

**Currently Listening To: **The thunder outside.

**Mood: **Angry. Trying to calm down.

**Subject: **More damn comments.

* * *

_**Comment from- Greece's kitty:**_

**2p Italy: WHAT DID YOU SAY!? GET ME MY FUCKING PASTA!  
Me: 2p Romano isn't stupid. He's a manwhore. There's a difference.  
2p Romano: IM NOT A MANWHORE BECAUSE I DO WHAT I ENJOY!  
Me: you enjoy being a manwhore. Now STFU OR GO DIE  
2p Romano:*shuts up***

* * *

I-I said y-you can go get i-it yourself! That's r-right. I fucking went t-there.

Oh god. A fucking man-whore. Just like that wine bastard. **HE ENJOYS IT?!** I think I'm going to go barf. (On the potato bastard's shoes.) I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT . . . **THING** IS MY COUNTERPART'S 2p. Ugh . . . I'm just fucking curious . . . What's 2p! Spain like? Is he still his annoying, idiotic self?

* * *

_**Comment from-Vampchick2010:**_

**1. Why would he rape Feli? He is just a really shy guy. I am a GerIta shipper. :P**

**2. Please answer this. How do you honestly feel about Spain? (Love or hate? Honestly please). Grazie! (And i won't tell Spain)**

**3. I see your point. I used to be a lot like you. Angry all the time. I am getting over it now. How about you try to make some friends that can help you with your anger issues?**

**4. Il Benvenuto (Your Welcome) (again Google translate)**

**5. Can I call you Lovi-Chan? Please?**

* * *

1) I see the way he looks at my Sorella. The other potato bastard disgusts me too. What the hell is GerIta? Japan might have said something about it to Hungary? And what the fuck is Spamano? I heard it has something to do with me . . . Better not be anything bad.

2) Er, he's . . . um. Veryimportanttome_**.**_ I hope the idiot's not reading this . . .

3) Anger issues? What fucking anger issues? I don't have anger issues. It's just that being surrounded by bastards and bitches

4) . . .

5) NO! I . . . FELI DON'T YOU DA- wfdbb%^XCTcf2#$

**((Feli got on the computer . . . again.))**

_Ve~ she changed her mind and says yes~! And she likes Spain~ _

NO I DON'T. Fine. You can call me Lovi-Chan . . .

* * *

_**Comment from-Mossstripes:**_

**Felicia! I just want to say**

**...**

**America:*throws a random Germany and Prussia clones at Lovina***  
***troll face* Haha! I'm the hero!**  
**Me: -_0 ignore him... anyways *whispers* I know you love Germany \\\_/...**  
**Lovi you love Spain! *gets choked by Lovina***

* * *

_Ve? Of course I love Germany! He's my best friend!_

What the fuck, burger bastard? YOU ARE **NOT** THE DAMN HERO. _**Gesu Cristo! **_You see what I have to go through! THEY. ARE. ALL. **IDIOTS.** And get off me potato bastards! I D-DON'T LIKE SPAIN. HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU PEOPLE. I. DON'T. LIKE. HIM. He's an idiot.

* * *

_**Comment from-livelaughluvmusic: **_

**Hey South Italy! I, personally, like you more than Feli and I really like you and Spain 3  
Haha~!  
Anyway, what is your opinion on Poland?**

* * *

_Grazie_ . . . I don't hear that often . . .

_Ve~! Sorella, what's wrong? Are you having allergies again? Your eyes are teary._

No! I'm not tearing, dammit! It just looks like it . . . I um, got new contacts . . .

_But you don't use contacts._

Shut up. What do you mean you like me and Spain . . .? Do you like us separately, or t-together, because I don't like that _bastardo_.

Poland? He's annoying as hell. He keeps on trying to get me to dress up in frilly, pink things. I hate pink.

* * *

_**Comment from-Seychelles (poptartlover7478):**_

**Hi Lovina, it's Seychelles  
Um, I got a new fish because my other one died and I can't find it. I asked 2p Spain and he said," I don't that bitch, Lovina. I heard she ate it because she hates you."  
I don't think you're a bitch, but is it true? Did you eat my fish? Do you hate me? ; - ;**

* * *

No, I didn't eat it. He called me a bitch?! Tell him I said he's a fucking bastard and he can go die.** ((She doesn't know how 2p! Spain is.)) ** I don't really know you . . . So I don't hate you. Where the hell is that bastard? I'm going to go kick his stupid-ass face.

* * *

_**Comment from-Red-Tulips-Are-Awesome:**_

**((Shit. I can't believe just found this now. Welp. Anyways, I shall add this to meh community!))  
Hello, Lovina! Did you know that your male counterpart is my favorite character? Why yes, he is. He's just unintentionally hilarious, because of his kind of stupidness.  
I love him anyways, dude.  
Hm...QUESTION TIME.  
1. Do I seem damn annoying to you? If I am, pfft...I'll be happy to annoy Spain as much as I want.  
2. I think you are wayyyy better than Italy, even though I can do him well...  
3. I think you're fucking awesome. You are kind of a role model for me, considering that I'm kind of like you. xD  
4. Pfft. Tomato Bastard has a blog, if you should know.  
(To teh Author: No need for censoring, it's rated T. Those little kiddies should know their ratings. xD)  
5. Is it weird that I cuss a hell whole lot?**

* * *

**((Lawl. And thank you~! Love your blogs!))**

_Ciao. _Of course. South Italy fucking rules. Everyone loves us. Of course he's stupid, all men are, but he's less idiotic than everyone else.

1) You're not annoying . . . **YET. **

2) . . .

_Ve~ You'll have to excuse my Sorella, her allergies are acting up again._

_Grazie . . . _After being compared to my Sorella for such a **long-ass** time, it means a lot . . .

3) Hear that Prussian bastard? **I'm fucking awesome**, probably more awesome than you. I-I'm your role model . . .?

_Sorella, your allergies are really bad today._

Shut up . . .

4) H-he does? Dammit, why am I stuttering so much . . .

_Ve~ Lovi, you look so red!_

Shut the hell up! It's just hot here!

_But . . . the Air Conditioner is on . . ._

. . .

5) Nope. It's BAD-ASS.

**((Alright. I won't censor them. Thanks. :D))**

* * *

_**Comment from-Springirth Dale:**_

**Ciao, Lovina-san.**

**Please calm down.**

**I won't bring anything up about the tomato-b*st*rd.**

**...Okay, that felt weird calling him that.**

**Again, please calm down. Y-your blood pressure-!**

**I know how it feels to have LOTS of f**ing people annoy you. Si, truly.**  
**There are LOTS of f**ing people...**

**But you need to cool down a little bit.**  
**But you can do whatever you want.**

**I'm just concerned for your well-being, Miss.**

**Well then, ciao.**

**P.S. Here's some tomatoes. I hope you feel better now.**

* * *

Ciao. Calm down?! I don't need to 'calm down'. I'm perfectly fine. GOOD. DON'T BRING HIM UP. My blood pressure won't rise . . . again. YES, THERE ARE. Hallelujah! Someone who **understands. **There are lots of fucking people . . . Well, then . . . _Grazie,_ I guess.

_You don't know how many times I try to get her not to yell. Ve~!_

* * *

_**Comment from-Spain (Rizu Roraito):**_

**((Posting as Spain Made a blog for him, you should check it out! :) ))**

**Hola, Lovi! You are like the muchacha (girl) version of him, right! You are just as cute as he is.**

**I have more tomatoes if you want them! :D Adios, Lovi!**

* * *

**((I'll go check it out. ;) ))**

Tomato bastard? What the fuck are you doing, reading my blog?! OH SHIT. I have to erase everything abou- Crap . . .

Yes, I'm the female version. AND I'M **NOT** CUTE, DAMMIT!

_Big Brother Spain! Ve~ she's tomato red! Lovi likes yo-_

SHUT UP! Shhhhh! Anyway, I'm going to your house so I don't have to see the potato bastard. Don't do anything stupid.

. . . Have the tomatoes on the table when I come over.

Bye, _Espagna._

* * *

**((XD Thank you for all of your comments~! And thank you for Red-Tulips-Are-Awesome for inspiring me to create this, and putting this in her community. Oh, and I will not censor the curse words. It's easier to write that way, anyway.))**


	4. Chapter 3: At Spain's House

**((Imporant announcement at the bottom.))**

**I'm finally at the tomato bastard's house. Although, I got a fucking cold on my way here, because of the freaking rain. Wonderful. Feli keeps on calling me, asking why I left. No way in hell I'm picking up, I might hear HIS voice. Damn potato _bastardo._ At least it calm here. It's quiet . . . and I'm just sitting here eating the delicious-as-fuck tomatoes** _**Spagna **_**(Spain) picked. Finally, some peace and quiet. No idiots to bother me here . . . FOR NOW. At least the other 2/3rd of the FAG trio (Haha, I love that name.) aren't here. And the rain is starting to clear up. GODDAMMIT FELI. Stop calling me! FINE, I'LL PICK IT UP. **

**Time: 2:30 PM**

**Mood: Trying To Remain Calm.**

**Listening To: Nothing.**

_New!_**Weather: Little bit of Rain.****  
**

_New! _**Location: (What the hell . . .? Damn stalkers.) Spain's house.****  
**

**Subject: The (Hopefully Not Stupid) Comments.**

* * *

**_Comment from-Spain (Rizu Roraito):_**

**(Thanks! :D)**

**I have nothing better to do than to read your blog. Okay... Maybe si, I have to take care of my cold, pero it's not that bad! :D **

**You are cute! You even got red, like a tomato! Hola Ita-chan! :D**

**Okay, Lovi! I will have them ready! :)**

**Hasta luego!**

**-Spain**

* * *

**((You welcome, bro~ :D))**

You have a cold? You should be resting, idiot! What if the fucking cold turns into a fever! N-not that I c-care . . . Are you sure it's not that bad? Again, it's not because I care . . . I'm j-just asking.

I'm not cute! N-no, I didn't blus- I mean, get red! And I didn't look like a tomato! . . . Bastard.

**((Feli on the phone))** _Hey, Big Brother Spain~!_

_Grazie_ for the tomatoes, tomato bastard.

* * *

_**Comment from-Greece's kitty:**_

**Me: ...lets see...2P SPAIN!2P ROMANO FELL OFF A CLIFF!**  
**2p spain: I dont care...2p romano can do whatever he wants...as long as he leaves me alone...**  
**Me: NOPE!**  
**2p italy:*throws knives* GIVE ME THE PASTA. NOW. OR DIE.**  
**Me:*hits 2p italy with shovel* STOP BEING MEAN! **  
**2p italy: BITCH!**  
***cue long fight here***  
**Me:SCREW THIS!*throws 2p italy out window***  
**CIAAAAAOOOOO**

* * *

Wow . . . He's the exact opposite of Spain. But they are both jerks.

I will NOT bring you the damn pasta. Screw you. Ha, you got hit with a shovel.

_Bonjour~!_

Wine bastard?! What the fuck are you doing here?

_I am here to visit Espagne. I heard he has a cold, and as his good friend, I wanted to make him feel better~_

Get the hell out.

_Aww . . . but-_

GET. THE. HELL. OUT.

_Bu-_

I will kick you in the balls so HARD that they will fucking turn into ashes, which I will force you to eat._  
_

_Fine._

Alright. Now, back to the comment. YES. The bastard got thrown out a window. _Ciao._

* * *

**((You're welcome dude. xD)**  
**Hey, do you like being hugged? BECAUSE I FUCKING HATE IT. D: And Spain tried to glomp me...I think...*Sighs.* Well, anyways.**  
**FUCK YEAH. I DAMN KNOW WELL THAT IT'S BADASS!**  
**Seriously, you and Vietnam are my role models.**  
**Oh, and I'm going to learn Italian! But my sister is being a potato bastard and learning German. *Rolls eyes.***  
**Well, ciao!**

* * *

_Ciao. _HELL no I don't like to be hugged. I'm not like Japan when it comes to hugging, (That guy needs his personar space.) but dammit, I don't like being hugged. Especially out of nowhere. Whoever does that to me is going to find a foot in their ass. I'm glad that SOMEONE FUCKING UNDERSTANDS.  
I'm glad you're not as idiotic as SOME people.

W-what?! How the hell can you choose GERMAN over Italian? That's just fucked up. I . . . I don't even know what to fucking say.

_Ciao._

* * *

**_Comment from-crazy Ying-Yang writer7_**

**love reading this so far  
keep it up**

* * *

**((Thank you~! :) ))**

* * *

**_Comment from-ShushI'mAReaderInBed_**

**Hi!**

**I understand what it's like to want to curse all the time... Unfortunately I somehow got labeled as naive and can't break that mould... Anyway...**

**1) seriously, you get that worked up over people prefering you to Italy? Well, I won't mention my class's opinion then. you might just have heart attack!**

**2) Do you have anyone you get on well with... anyone at all... Some of them aren't utter idiots... like... um... oh! Canada (finally, thought of someone!)**

* * *

Hello.

Sometimes I don't even notice I'm cursing. I guess I'm just used to it.

1) . . . .

2) Well, I do get along with the tea bastard sometimes. SOMETIMES. Wait, who are you talking about? Oh, him. Si, I get along with him too. He's quiet and not annoying. But everyone else is a whole fucking different story.

* * *

**_Comment from-_  
**

**XD I hate pink too**  
**Thanks for answering me**

**I like Spain and you separately and together as well**

**And your welcome! I mean Feli is okay but the hyperness could get to me after awhile! I'm more like 'get the hell away from me' to strangers while Feli will love 'em**  
**I have more in common with you and your funny and sweet even if it may not appear it at first! (kinda like me)**  
**And you can stand up for yourself! Girls aren't fucking weak! The fact that you serve as proof rocks!**  
**... Wow that was long...**  
**See ya, South Italy!**

* * *

Pink just . . . UGH.

_Prego. _(You're welcome.)

Oh that's goo- WAIT A MINUTE. Separately and . . . I won't even dare look at the next word.

Her hyperness gets to me too. I have to resist the urge to bang my head on a damn wall. That's why I can never leave _Sorella _alone with strangers. I mean, if she wasn't alone, she wouldn't have met the potato bastard.

_Sorella, I'm still on the phone~! Doitsu is here too!_

Oh shit. GottagoFelibye.

_Wai-_

Anyway, I'm funny and sweet . . .? _Grazie, _I guess.

Most people think girls are emotional piles of(emotional) hormonal wrecks. Or that they're easy. But I beg to differ, thank you very much.

_Ciao._

* * *

**_Comment from-Springirth Dale:_**

**A-Ah okay! I'm sorry. I was just concerned. ...I also have lots of people telling me to f*ing calm down...but when they get mad or somethin' they don't calm down, they don't practice what they preach.**  
**Sigh, it's so f***ing annoying...Sh*t...**

**De nada. **  
**...**  
**...**  
**Woah! Woah! What the heck did I just say ? ! **  
**Did I just . . . Type in Español ? !**  
**Oh mein gott... Ayay! Sorry again...Deutsch...**

**Sorry sorry really sorry! **

**P.S.**  
**Daijobu, Itaria-san. **  
**I yell like your sorella too.**  
**I even cuss like her everyday. (Maybe.)**

* * *

Damn hypocrites. I know how you feel . . . I go though it a lot. It. Is. Annoying. As. Fuck.

_Ve~_

What th- I thought I hung up!

_You didn't~! Oh, and Germany, Japan and me are having a slumber party~!_

You didn't tell me anything about this!

_Because I knew you would say no, ve~_

NO! The potato bastard will NOT be sleeping there!

_Please . . .?_

. . . Fine.

_Yay~_

Great . . . Now I have to find somewhere I can stay . . .

_Why don't you come home~?_

Because that . . . thing is there.

Back to the comment.

It's alright . . . German . . . that language disgusts me . . .

It's okay . . .

_Hello there~! You yell just like her? Ooh, you must be loud then! You curse like her everyday too? Are you her clone? :O_

_. . . _Ignore my dumb_ Sorella._

* * *

**G'day Lovina! I'm some random on the Internet who thinks you're awesome! XD**

**Now that I think about it, I would really like to visit South Italy... I must save up! :D**

**... I think you and Spain -if you haven't already- should hook up! XP**

**PLEASE DON'T KILL ME! DX *hides behind stuffed red-eyed koala* (I actually have one.. IT'S SO DAMN CREEPY.)**

* * *

Hi. . . . Okay then? Thanks . . . Prussia should be bowing to MY awesomeness now. Oh crap. I'm turning into him. Now I know what awesomeness does to you . . . That may be the reason he's such a douchebag . . .

Yes. Please visit. Tourism helps the economy. Mine is not so good right now . . .

NOOOOOOOO. I NO LIKEY HIM LIKE DAT. NO. NO. NO. NO. **NO. **DX The tomato bastard is my 'boss'.

_Ve~ You should Sorella!_

NOOO- Wait . . . how the flying shit are you reading the comments? I'm speaking to you on the phone.

_ . . . I don't know~! :D_

Dumbass.

* * *

**_Comment from- Vampchick2010:_**

**1. Gerita is germany and italy as a couple. And spamano is you and spain as a couple. hehe~ such cute pairings. What do you think about this?~**

**2. yay! you love spain. What is your favorite thing about spain?**

**3. Lovi-chan that is seen as anger issues. but i will drop it for now.**

**4. grazie for letting me call you lovi-chan. you are more awesome than prussia any day.**

**5. Do you like my name? I love hearing other's opinions on it.**

* * *

1) That bastard and Veneziano as a couple. That's just . . . ew. WAIT. They even have a name for us. Oh god . . . NO. FUCK NO.

2) NO. I didn't say that! I guess my favorite thing about him is the fact that . . . he doesn't compare me to my sister unlike other people. He sees me as a unique person . . . N-not that I find that sweet . . .

3) Alright then.

4) Ha, you see that you Prussian bastard? **I'M** the awesome one.

5) It's cool. It's unique. And it's not like some idiotic names I've seen on other websites.

* * *

**Because of my pasta-molesting sister, I now have to find a place to sleep. Fucking fabulous. Should I ask . . . Spain? The room in which I had slept in when I was a (VERY cute) child is still there . . . Maybe I could ask someone else, but they are all fucking _idiotas_. This is shitty. **

**Anyway, now that my calm mood is ruined, I'll go find some more tomatoes. But, before I do that, there's this new thing on the blog. You can . . . send me videos or the disgusting and disturbing things you call 'fanfiction' if you want me to see them. Whatever. **

* * *

**((Anyway, I would like to speak to you guys about the pairings. I adore Spamano, but, you might not see it in here, becase different people like different pairings, and I don't want to be unfair to those readers. Maybe after a while. MAYBE. But, I don't mind if you send in those Spamano comments. Thank you for reading~!))**


	5. Chapter 4: Damn Alarm Clock

**Urrgghh . . . I really did NOT feel like getting up today . . . Fuck. I'm so tired. I hardly slept. Feli kept on calling me, demanding I tell her a story. I don't even know how the hell I'm typing . . . Wondering why I'm in a shitty mood? My damn alarm clock. I don't even know why I have that thing . . . It's so annoying, and I always forget where the damn snooze button is. I feel like throwing it out the fucking window. Damn it . . . why is life so freaking complicated? DX**

**Time: 6:30 AM**

**Mood: Tired, Frustrated, Irritated**

**Listening To: The damn alarm clock going; "Wake the fuck up! Wake the fuck up!" I think I know how Antonio and Carmen (Fem! Spain) feel when I wake them up like that . . . ****  
**

**Subject: Alright, this 'Subject' thing is getting irritatingly idiotic. **

* * *

_**Comment from-Spain: **_

**¿Porque no vienes arriba a verme? (Why don't you come upstairs to see me?) :D I can't stand up right now. I think it is turning into a fiebre (fever).**

**Pero it's not that bad! :D**

**Why didn't you hablar antes (say something before)? You can stay at my casa (house) whenever you want!**

**You are cute, Lovi! :)**

**¿Como estas, Ita-chan? (How are you?) :)**

**De nada! (No problem!)**

**-Spain**

* * *

Fine . . . I'm only going upstairs to see you . . . N-not because I c-care or anything! Idiot . . . you should've rested. I'm coming up. With tomato soup.

Tch . . . Yeah sure.

_Grazie._

**N-NO**! Dammit, not . . . cute . . .

Feli's not on the phone right n-

_Ve~ I'm good Big Brother Spain!_

. . . Feli . . . How the hell are you still on the phone?

_I don't know~ _

Whatever.

**((You don't have to do the translations if you want to, the authoress knows Spanish. :D))**

* * *

**_Comment from-__Greece's kitty:_**

**me:*pokes 2p lativa*  
brazil: you killed him, didnt you?  
me: yes. hes creepy.  
2p italy:WHY ARE YOU SO HAPPY AB-*gets pushed off cliff*FUUUUUUUUUUUU-  
me:I HAVE A HEADACHE!SHUT UP!  
brazil:how many people did you kill today!?  
me: 57, why?  
brazil: that was a ritorical question...  
me: tell that to turkey*points at turkey, who is slowly dieing*he tried to take my pasta.  
brazil:...what does that have to do with anything?  
me: i dunno.  
brazil:...lets blame the deaths on potato bastard  
me: we can't  
brazil:why?  
me: i killed him too  
brazil:...lets blame it on wine bastard  
me: shoot, i just killed him.  
brazil: who didnt you kill?  
me: people that i dont hate.  
brazil:...  
me:WE SHALL BLAME THE BARRELS!THEY ARE FUCKING EVIL!  
CIAAAAAOOOOO**

* * *

. . . You kill a lot of people . . .

Ha! You got pushed off a cliff! Bastard . . .

AND you killed the potato bastard?! :D

The wine bastard too~?! 8D

Er . . . The barrels . . .? What did 'the barrels' do . . .?

_Ciao . . ._

* * *

_**Comment from-Springirth Dale: **_

**Exactly. So *damn f*ing annoying like sh*t...  
I feel like I just cussed a lot...**

**Okay. It's kind of unfair your sister doesn't tell you stuff. Like throwing slumber parties at your house with a person you so f*ing hate.**

**Si. I yell like her (sometimes, on some occasions), and I cuss too, but I try not to f*ing show it...but in my head, I'm cussin' A LOT alright.**  
**I hate those people that f*ing piss me off, they should get caught in a tomato fight and lose. LOSE.**

**...**  
**Okay, that was silly.**

**And no, I don't think I'm her clone..but I am also an elder sister.**

**Actually, it's alright. I have sorellas like that too. But..they're pretty okay.**  
**Though they can be a handful.**  
**Though we fight everyday.**  
**Though we are quarreling about little things everyday.**

**Sigh..it's all right. You are an elder sister too. I guess we were born as an elder sister, I guess it has a purpose or something.**  
**Even though it can be slightly irritating or troublesome.**  
**I guess there's nothing you can do about it.**  
**Unless you have something in mind.**  
**Which I don't.**

**Well then, ciao! ;)**

* * *

You didn't cuss a lot. Be proud of your cussing. It's **badass.**

It is unfair . . . but I can't honestly stay mad at her. Though next time she's left alone, I will put up more security cameras. MORE.

Yeah . . . Feli's a little braver than her counterpart, so we fight more often. Though sometimes its for stupid-ass reasons. It is troublesome being an older sister, but hey, like you said, there's nothing you can do about it.

_Ciao. _

**((The authoress is an older sister, so she understands. ;D))**

* * *

**Comment from- Red-Tulips-Are-Awesome: **

**WHAT? I WANT TO LEARN ITALIAN. NOT DAMN GERMAN LIKE A POTATO BASTARD. **  
**Yeah. That's it. Mi Dispiace (I'm sorry), though...**  
**Well. I'm glad you don't like being hugged, either.**  
**Maybe you could ask any of the girl nations...you know, like...Vietnam or, something.**  
**Or you can stay over at Belgium's house. Yeah. That'll work.**  
**Well, ciao, Lovina!**

* * *

GOOD. YOU HAVE MADE THE FUCKING RIGHT DECISION.

I actually liked being hugged before, but . . . let's just say I had some bad experiences with hugging. VERY BAD.

Oh yeah . . . Belgium's house . . .

. . . *facepalm*

_Ciao._

* * *

**_Comment from-LilyPetals002:_**

**Ciao Lovina!**

**Just wanted to tell you two things. You said we can show you fanfiction to see your reaction to it right? Read 'Buttholes in Paris by Kanye East' by Spain has CAAANDY. Just read it.**

**Oh and, you're so cute~! You and Spain should totally date. ;3**

**Bye~**

* * *

_Ciao. _**  
**

Just by reading the title, I can tell I'm not going to like the story. Alright . . . here we go . . .

*Finds story and reads*

. . . *Mind blown to **pieces***

. . . What the . . . fuck? What the hell was that shit? I didn't know the counterparts were so . . . uh . . .

. . . What was that . . . I don't even . . .

I'M **NOT** CUTE! **_I'm sexy._** There's a fucking difference.

. . . W-what?! How many times do I have t-to say it? I'm not d-dating that bastard!

_Ve~ But Sorella-_

Shut up, Feli.

* * *

**((Posting as Germany. I saw your comment on his blog, but I'll do that tomorrow cuz I feel lazy xD))**

**Lovina,**

**Seeing as how you read my blog, I thought it was only fair to see your blog *coughEventhoughIdon'tlikeyouthatmuchCough* **  
**Why do you have this weird fetish for think I'll rape Feli? Like, what the fuck? I have no such intentions!**

**Stop Calling me a Potato Bastard,**  
**Germany (Ludwig)**

* * *

**((Alright. Lawl~ And thank you for the comment, it made me laugh. XD))**

Stupid Potato Eater,

I don't read it bastard. I just found it, and decided to warn you to stay the hell away from Feliciano and Felicia. *CoughIdon'tlikeyoueitherbastardoCough*

WHAT?! It's not a fetish! I should be the one saying WTF? AND YOU DO HAVE SUCH INTENTIONS. I know what you're up to. Just like I know about your PORN COLLECTION! Feli told me.

Ya, I went there **potato bastard.**

Kiss my precious ass,

Romana/Lovina Vargas

P.S: I swear you are just as bad as your stupid counterpart . . .

* * *

**_Comment from-Vampchick2010: _**

**1. How is that you are still sane after all this time?**

**2. What is your method of making a bad day into a better one?**

**3. I am just curious what are your favorite types of music?**

* * *

1) . . . I wonder about that too sometimes. Well, even though most of the countries are idiots, there are still those** few** people that are sane. Thus, that leaves a little hope for me not to think that the whole world is stupid.

2) I just take _siestas_, and eat tomatoes. Basically, I try to do what I enjoy and relax. But that's kind of hard when you're a country, and you have an idiot for a sister.

3) It actually depends on the lyrics. If I like the song's lyrics, there's a big chance I might like the song over all. But I don't like those songs that stupid America is making these days. Most of them make no fucking sense.

* * *

**_Comment from- crazy YingYang writer7_  
**

**Hey Lovi, **  
**There's many people I know that pair you with Spain and pair your Sorella with Germany in a lot of stories. **  
**It's interesting to read. . . . . .**

* * *

_Ciao._

**M-many** people?! M-me and SPAIN?! . . . .

. . . .

. . . . **Feli and that stupid, **_**stronzo?** _T-that potato eater?! The thought makes me nauseous . . . Ugghh . . .

It's Interesting . . . ? At least you didn't say it was romantic or shit any like that . . .

Oh god, now I have a head ache.

_Gesu Cristo . . ._

* * *

**_Comment from-Starlit Hero: _**

**Ciao Lovi,  
I thought you might enjoy my story, 'Stop waving the red flag' it's about Spain getting mauled by a bull and ending up in hospital!**

* * *

_Ciao._

M-mauled by a b-bull . . .?! *Goes off to read hurriedly* N-not because I care.

. . .

. . .

It's Spamano, isn't it.

I really enjoyed Chapter 7, when my counterpart was 'flirting'. Haha~!

* * *

**_Comment from- livelaughluvmusic:_**

**Hi, Feli! And if Germany's there then my bro can talk to him (He speaks German now. He learns languages all the time)**

**(This is so fun to read! It all makes me smile! lol)**

**And yes! Girls aren't easy! Men are just whores!. . . Sometimes.**

**Are you good at math? I really really hate it!**

* * *

**((Aww. Thanks~! I'm glad it makes you smile! :D Your review made me smile too. ;3))**_  
_

_Ve~ Hello!_

Feli . . . is the potato-head still there?

_. . . Yes I am. Um, I can hear you. _

Do you think I care? Anyway, why would your brother want to talk with that bast-

_ Hallo. And I guess he can talk to me._

Shut it. No one asked you.

_ . . . Erm. Yes they did?_

. . . Shut up. Back to the comment. Anyway, since in my world most of the countries are girls, it's harder for us, you know, with women not having rights for a long time. Back then, lots of people thought I was easy, but I sure as hell showed them!

I guess I'm okay at math, but I don't like it either. Feli can't do math to save her life, so I tutor her. She's always asking me if the potato eater can join, but why would we need him?

* * *

**Now, if you'll excuse me, I think I'll go back to bed . . .**

**(Alarm Clock) "Wake the fuck up! Wake the f up!" **

**After I go upstairs to see Spain.**

**(Alarm Clock) Wake the fuck up! Wake the-**

***throws clock at wall***

**Damn, now I need to get a new one. **

* * *

**((Thank you for all your comments~!))**

*****Stardust98*****


	6. Chapter 5: Worst Comments Yet

**I'm still tired . . . D: Alright. I went to see Spain, (the idiot is always smiling . . .) and now I can finally relax and look at the comments. Feli just called and said the potato bastard just left (Thank God!) so I guess I'm heading home in the afternoon. It's quiet in the house. Hmm . . . it's actually kind of peaceful for once.**

**Almost TOO peaceful. I have a bad feeling . . .**

**Then again, it could just be me getting paranoid. Oh well. **

**. . . .**

**I still need a new freaking alarm clock. Damn it all. Damn it all to HELL.**

**. . . .**

**I need a fucking vacation.**

**Time:** 11:00 AM

**Currently Listening To: **Nothing.

**Mood: **Calm.

**Subject: **I need a damn vacation.

* * *

**_Comment-Greece's kitty:_**

**me:THE BARRELS ARE FUCKING EVIL!  
Germany: youre crazy...  
Me:AHHH ZOMBIE¡!*throws germany at the bro* KILL HIM NOT ME!  
2p romano: CIAAAAA-  
Me:*pushes him out the window*HOW DO THEY GET IN MY HOUSE!?  
Turkey: you leave the door unlocked, stupid.  
Me:*mails turkey to hell*FUCKING MALAKES COMING IN MY FUCKING HOUSE TRING TO FRICKEN ANNOY ME!  
Steve: ...  
Me:...*rips out his eyes and shoves them down his throat* fucking malaka. Fricken not letting countries go. Asshole*throws steve to 2p land*  
Im in a bad mood now. So ciao.**

* * *

Er, why are they evil . . .?

Shut up, **potato bastard**.

Um . . . My counterpart's 2p must be really . . . stupid. Then again, men in general are pretty dumb.

*Sees Steve*

. . . . . . .

* * *

**_Comment from- Spain (Rizu Roraito): _**

**Spain:**

**Yay. :D Gracias, Lovi! :)**

**That's genial to know, Ita-chan! Want a churro? I could go visit! :)**

**(Okay! :D That's great, it kinda gets a little annoying.)**

* * *

Yeah . . . Whatever. Anyway do you . . . er, f-feel better . . .?

_Si~! Ve, of course you can visit~!_

. . . Wait what? But-

_Sorella, be nice._

. . . Fine.

Oh, tomato bastard, the tomato bitch, Carmen (Fem! Spain) says hi.

**((I feel ya. I had to translate Italian every time I role played Romano.))**

* * *

_**Comment from-Qualeshia Marshall:**_

**I'm adding this to favorites, to the writer, thanks a bunches and take care!**

**1) Are you always on your period, because you seem so bitter and angry, yeah they suck but you know welcome to womanhood?**

**2) What is your favorite genre in movies, music, and books(actors, musician, and author)?**

**3) How do you handle yourself around a sexy Italian male? **

**4) What do you like to do on your spare alone time? **

**5) What do you do when a serial rapist tries to hurt you(do you scream or fight)? **

**6) Adding with number three, what do you look for in a man/what is your type? **

**Beh è stato bello chiacchierare con voi e godere di fare domande. Ti sembra una donna bella e giovane e spero che otteniamo molto. Addio amico(Well it was nice chatting with you and I enjoy asking questions. You seem like a lovely young woman and I hope we get along greatly. Goodbye friend)!**

* * *

((Thank you~! :D))

1) NO! How come everyone thinks I'm PMSing! I'M **NOT** ON MY DAMN PERIOD!

_But you are always angry, Sorella . . ._

. . . I don't want to talk about it.

2) . . . W-well, I like horror, and sad stuff . . . (I **don't** cry, dammit!) A-and I also like . . .

_It's okay, Sorella~! No one will make fun of you! Ve~_

. . . R-r . . . IALSOLIKEROMANCE.

_There, was that so hard?_

Shut up.

3) . . . This question.

_Go on! Answer it, Sorella!_

O-okay . . . well, I actually despise men, like my counterpart . . . But, to answer your question, they usually flirt with me first. Though I can tell if they just want to get laid.

_And Lovi stutters and blushes, ve~! :)_

No!

4)I like to take a _siesta. _And eat tomatoes.

5) I scream AND fight.

_Ve~ She usually calls for Spain to help-_

NO I **DON'T.**

6) . . . Someone that **doesn't try to get in my pants** after the first few minutes of meeting each other. And a guy who does not think think I'm easy, like some douchebag. I . . . can't talk about this right now. :(

I guess it was nice chatting with you . . . _Grazie _and _Ciao._

* * *

**_Comment from-Vampchick2010: _**

**1. Thanks for answer the previous questions. I was having a bad day and you really helped me feel better. so grazie.  
2. If Germany is still there, I want to say hi. I am learning korean and trying to learn german. yay german. sorry lovi-chan.  
3. I know what you mean about music. I love my variety in music. except country. I really hate country.  
4. What is your proof that Germany wants to rape Feli?  
5. What is a typical day for a country anyway? I am always curious about that.  
6. I hope I am not annoying you with all my questions.**

* * *

1) _Prego. _

_2)_ The potato bastard isn't here.

_Ve~ But I'll tell him you said hi!_

NOOOOOO! W-why?!

_It's okay, Sorella! German is a pretty language too!_

**NO.**

3) Like I said before, it really doesn't matter to me unless the lyrics are nice and **MAKE SENSE.**

**((Note that the authoress is really trying not to rant about nonsensical music.))**

4) You want proof? Well, Feli told me that Germany was hiding something, and it had to be really, really bad, because he got mad at her when she tried to ask him about it. So I, in hopes of getting some blackmail, sneaked to his house, and looked for about twenty minutes. Then, I searched inside his bedroom, and found a little door in his closet.

That was where I found it.

I immediately got disgusted and ran to the bathroom to barf._ Si_, I went to the bastard's bathroom. Don't judge me, what was in his closet scarred me . . . and it would scar **you** too. The potato bastard saw me, and asked me what the hell I was doing in his house. I told him to shut the fuck up, and left after cleaning up.

_I want to know what was there! Ve~_

No Feli . . . If you knew, it would scar you too. Anyway, if the potato bastard was **THAT** perverted, imagine what he would do to my sister . . . No one can be that sexually frustrated and control themselves around a sexy Italian for **THAT** long. Well, maybe he wouldn't **rape** her, but still . . .

I'm getting sick just thinking about it . . .

_Ve?_

5) Well . . . Here's MY typical day . . . as a country. When I go to a 'world meeting'. (More like a hellhole.)

_It isn't that bad~!_

I wake up in the morning-

_Feeling like P-Diddy? ;D_

NO! What the hell?

_Sorry, ve . . . :(_

I usually wake up, ya know, do the usual morning routine. Except Feli wakes me up extra early, for no damn reason. I don't know why though, I don't attend the world meetings a lot. I usually just do the paperwork, since Veneziana can't do it herself. Well, let me just tell you what happens when I DO attend a world meeting.

Feli usually goes to the meetings with the potato bitch and Japan, while I usually go with the tomato bitch. I sit in between Spain and Hungary (the damn pervert.). Carmen is annoying as fuck, she never stops freaking pinching my cheeks and cooing and all that shit. The damn Hungarian just takes pictures, probably trades them with Japan. England is as bitchy as ever, and France can't keep her filthy hands to herself.

_You get really mad when you talk about the others . . ._

They're all stupid. America stands on the table, and yells about how she's the damn hero, with her dumb shorts. Those damn things are so fucking short they could be a damn belt. They barely cover her ass. Potato bitch #2 yells about how she's awesome and shit, and Austria always has to argue with her. Feli fucking gropes the German bitch, while she just screams for order, and I have to tell her who the hell made her the fucking boss of the meeting.

We only get through five or six presentations, (probably more than our counterparts) before England and France get into a freaking cat fight. That's usually when I walk out the room and head home. They can go screw themselves. I try to just relax, but then I can't because I realize I didn't do THE FUCKING PAPERWORK.

So, I, Lovina Chiara Vargas, can honestly say that my life sucks balls.

_Lovi c-calm down! Remember about your blood pressure, ve!_

6) No, you're not . . . Your questions are fine. SO FAR.

* * *

_**Comment from-Italy (Red-Tulips-Are-Awesome):**_

**Ve! Ve! Ciao, Bellas! It's nice to see you all, ve! :D  
...Hm...Germany commented here, I'm guessing! Oh! And he gave out his password on his blog! You should go hack into his blog, ve! * Unconsciously gave Lovina the password.*  
Well, ciao for now! ;D  
-N. Italy Veneziano**

* * *

_Ciao. _You must be Felicia's counterpart.

_Ve! *Looks at blog* Look at him, he's such a cutie! :D Want some pasta?_

You two must be really similar to each other . . . Yes, the potato bastard commented here. **HE DID?** I knew he was a dumb-ass. And I will go hack his blog right away~

_No, Sorella, don't do it! D: . . . And did you just use a tilde?_

*hiss* Yessss. Thank you so much~!

_ Ciao~!_

Ah, _si_. _Ciao_. _Grazieeee_~! *still has evil grin on face*

_Ve . . . Are you okay Lovi? Are you . . . smiling?_

Hahaha~ HAHAHA~!

_. . . _

* * *

_**Comment from-Soarra: **  
_

**Hullo Lovina!  
I totally feel your pain as the older sister. My sorellina(little sister) is the most fucking annoying person EVER. May be worse than yours. I mean think a mixture of Felicia and that bastard Poland and you get my bastard of a sorella.  
Not to mention the fact that I cant fucking cuss in public 'cause in public because I am 'to young'. It sucks balls.  
I love you Lovina. You're pretty much my idol along with your male counterpart. And you're gonna be one of the people I'm gonna get my cosplay for first.  
Ciao!**

* * *

Ciao.

A mix of Felicia and Poland . . .? Oh crap.

_Ve?_

That does suck balls. Reminds me of the times Spain scolded me for cussing in public when I was little. Whatever.

T-thank you. T-that was . . . nice.

_Ve~ You made Sorella happy~!_

I remember one time I went to a con. I went to one with my sister (she forced me to go) and when a bunch of people saw us, they yelled something about Itacest. What the fuck is that? It sounds disgusting. Probably is.

_But the con was fun, Sorella!_

_Ciao~!_

* * *

**_Comment from-Springirth Dale: _  
**

**Ahaha! Grazie, amiga! :D**

**I know right? *sigh* But I guess it's fine...Either sorella or fratello fight anyway either way. **  
**Fighting, arguments are inevitable when you have siblings.**

**Something random I wanna put: Tomatoes are awesome, aren't they? I like 'em!**

**((I see...))**

* * *

_Prego._

Me and Feli fight more than our counterparts do. Mostly because my Feli is a bit more braver than her counterpart, and not as ditzy. Felicia can be fucking irritating sometimes. Makes me wanna smack her.

_Hey! D:_

But, she is my little sister. AndIstillcareabouther. But seriously, she gets me freaking pissed.

Of course tomatoes are awesome. More awesome than Prussia will ever fucking be.

_Aren't potatoes awesome too? :D_

NO FUCKING WAY. THAT POTATO BITCH GOT YOU TO LIKE THEM?

_No! Louise (Fem! Germany) is a nice person! D:_

Dammit. Now I'm fucking pissed. That damn bitch got my fucking _sorella_ to like potatoes.

_Try it! You might actually like them! :(_

I will NOT TRY THAT FUCKING ABOMINATION! I don't get how people call that food!

_ . . . Next comment! Before Lovi explodes . . ._

* * *

_**Comment from- Guest: **_

**But the romantic ones are annoying as fuck though. There's even weirder (trying not to insult the other people) people that pairs you up with Feli. Theres also people I strongly would want to use a flamethower on that would pair you up with France and Germany, those creep the shit out of me. . . . I wonder what I can get away with if I try to get rid of them or traumatize them. For just traumatizing me.**

* * *

. . .

. . .

. . .

. . .

Oh god . . .

YOU FUCKING SICK PEOPLE. YOU PAIR ME UP WITH **FELI? OH MY GOD. This IS AS BAD AS POTATOES. **What the **fuckitty fucking helllllll**. WE. ARE. **SISTERS. SIISSSSTEERRSSSS. GESU CRISTO. **I think I'm going to cry . . . That's just fucked up. Is this that Itacest thing? EWW.

_Ve . . . Sorella . . .? You're going to break the CAPS button._

FELI. SHIELD YOUR VIRGIN EYESSSS.

_Sorella, just calm down . . . And read the next part of the comment. I'm not happy about it either, but it can't be worse than the first sentence right?_

Right . . .

. . .

. . .

. . .

. . .

NO WAY. YOU'RE LYING. *Looks up*

. . .

You were right Feli. This isn't worse.

_You see? Now-_

THIS IS JUST AS BAD. NOOOO. I'm scarred. T-the potato bastard AND the w-wine bastard? _Gesu Cristo._

_I'm going to hang up now . . . Before my eardrums explode, ve. But Sorella, look at the bright side._

W-What . . .?

_It's still a better love story than Twilight. :D_

. . .

NOT HELPING.

Now **I'm** traumatized . . .

* * *

**That was the worst thing ever . . . I can't wait to go home, even if the tomato bastard is coming. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll go sign up for anger management. If I don't my boss will kill me. **

**Note to self: Get a damn vacation. Away from all these idiots.**

**Ciao.**

* * *

**((Comments? :D))**


	7. Chapter 6: With Two Idiots

_**Bold and italicized text is Fem!Spain.**_

_Italicized text is Fem!Italy._

Regular text is Lovina.

**((Um, I recently heard that Critics United doesn't like the blogs, since they're interactive stories, so please send in letters through PM. this is the last chapter with letters as reviews. I might even start over, MAYBE. But, I'm too lazy to. :P /shot/ Anons, make an account if you can . . . ))**

* * *

**Ciao motherfuckers. **

**I'm finally got home . . . But, the tomato bastard is coming. Feli is here, and the tomato bitch is here too. Great. Now I'm going to have to deal with three idiots. At least the potato fucker is gone. **

**I STILL NEED A NEW ALARM CLOCK! GODDAMMIT!**

**. . . Damn . . . I almost forgot, we have a world meeting tomorrow . . .**

**I think I'm going to drive there. AND I'M NOT A BAD DRIVER, DAMMIT! . . . Well, just because I have gotten a few tickets before, DOES NOT mean I'm a bad driver.**

**. . .**

**. . . Is eighteen tickets a lot . . .?**

**. . .**

**Nope.**

**Anyway, about the name thing . . . Some people say they don't like the name Lovina (HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE MY NAME? It's fucking sexy.) so you can call me Chiara. I don't mind. **

**Time: 2:10 PM**

**Currently Listening To: Arms by Christina Perri. (Somebody recommended me this song. Said something about this song fitting me and . . . another person well. Meh, whatever.)**

**Mood: Irritated**

**Subject: . . . Screw this.**

* * *

_**Comment from-Spain (Rizu Roraito):  
**_

**Much better, Lovi, gracias!**

**Really? I will be coming to your casa right now!**

**¡Hola, Carmen! ¿Como estas? Or actually, if you are in Lovi and Feli's house, then answer that question when I get there!**

**-España**

* * *

Ugh, I can seriously picture you smiling like an idiot while you were typing that comment.

**_(Fem! Spain): Lovi! Is this my counterpart? :D_**

_Ve, I can't wait for when he gets here!_

What the hell are you two doing here? I'm kinda fucking busy! And don't call me that.

**_Language__ Lovi._**

I can cuss whenever the hell I want, thank you very fucking much. Don't call me that.

**_Lovi.__Language._**

_V-ve, Spain is scary . . ._

**_Anyway . . . _****¡Está bien! :D I can't wait! I could show him pictures of you when you were little,**_ Lovi!_

Don't call me that. AND NO. Didn't I burn those?

**_Nope!__ :D_**

Stop smiling. It's annoying.

_What do you mean? :D _

You're doing it on purpose, Veneziana. I thought I burned those pictures! DON'T SHOW HIM.

**_But what about that time when the__ seagull-_**

NOOOOOO! **FUCK NO.**

_Oh! That one, ve. Hehee._

It's not funny. D:

**_Pero, eras tan__ linda-_**

I SAID NO, DAMMIT.

**_D:_**

* * *

**Comment from-Italy (Red-Tulips-Are-Awesome)**

**Ve! Ciao, bellas!  
I'm sorta like Felicia, but...she beat me up whenever I met her...-_-  
That wasn't very nice of her, ve...but...  
I'M GOING TO LEARN HOW TO STAND UP FOR MYSELF, VE! You'll help me, right? I got a knife and everything! And then I'll finally know how to stand up for myself, ve!  
...I know that Germany reads that shit...*Face darkens.* Maybe he should be the first one I stand up to, ve! D: Because I dun want him to stain the poor bellas! D:  
A-Ah, mi dispiace, ve...I...kind of...got...er...off-topic, ve...Very sorry...  
Well, ciao for now bellas. Would you like to have some pasta with me, later? ;D  
-Italy.**

* * *

Feli has some anger issues. But she can control herself . . . sometimes.

_Hey! I can control myself, ve! :(_

I **will** help you. I-I'm so proud of you right now . . .

_Sorella, are you . . . crying?_

N-no, It's my allergies.

**_Pero Lovi, you don't have any allergies . ._**_ ._

Shut up. Anyway, I **will** help you stand up to yourself, and then, Italy can be one of the most powerful countries in the world~! Hahaha~!

_Ve . . . Not again. _

_**? **  
_

**YES**. Stand up to that . . .** thing** first.

**_Lovi-_**

Nope.

**_You didn't even know what I was about to say! D:_**

It was probably 'Be nice, Lovi' or some shit like that.

**_How did you know?__ :O_**

Oh god . . .

_Ooh~ I want to go get some pasta~! I'll go!_

_**Yo tambien.** **:D**_

Sure. Ciao.

* * *

_**Comment from- Lesvos (Greece's kitty):**  
_

**my little brother isnt stupid, turkey is the only stupid one.  
greece: im older than you by 6 years, mytilini...  
its okay little brother. its okay  
greece:-_-  
kitty: *punching barrels* i dont trust you, barrel...KYA!*hits barrel with sledge hammer* i dont trust you either iron maiden, YOU GO FIRST!*throws spain at statue*  
spain: its o-  
*lights turn off*  
kitty:AHHHHHHH!*throws 2p romano at lights*  
*lights turn back on and the bro is seen*  
kitty:...*throws.2p italy* why does this seem familar...hmmm...**

* * *

Turkey is stupid, but he's not the only one. There's a lot of morons.

_:D_

_**:)**  
_

. . . See what I mean?Iron . . . Maiden?

_Ooh~! You're talking about PewDiePie aren't you? 8D_

_**Yo lo conozco! He's fun**_**_ny.__ :__D_**

_Who the hell is PewDiePie?_

_. . ._

**_. . ._**

_Sorella . . . How could you not know who PewDiePie is?! :O_

Um, . . . I just don't. And will you two stop with the emoticons?

**_Lovi, you have to watch a video!_**

. . . Do I have to?

_Yes!_

I'll do it later.

* * *

**_Comment from- FlyingZebraStraws_  
**

**I know what you have to deal with when it comes to Feli... only times four. Yes, unfortunately I am the older sister to two younger sisters and two younger brothers. My house is a living HELL! Anyway, just want to say that you are my role model. I love how you are so badass and can still stand up for your sorella. I also REALLY want to learn Italian, such a beautiful language. Have a wonderful day!  
-FlyingZebraStraws**

* * *

_*Tries to do math* Sorella? What is me times four? :/_**  
**

Four Felis? Damn . . . What did I tell you about the emoticons, Feli?

_I'm not that bad! Hmph!_

I'm your role model? Heh, I'm pretty awesome.

**_You sound like Prussia. :D_**

Dammit! I'm doing it again! Anyway, damn right I'm badass.

_She doesn't have to stand up for me! I can stand up for myself! . . . Sometimes . . ._

You have made the right choice by learning Italian. It is a very beautiful language, MUCH better than German.

_:(_

* * *

**_Comment from- America (The Hero yo):_**

**WOAHWOAHWOAH.**  
**YOU. ARE. FEM. LOKI.**  
**WHATTHEFUCK?! Fem!loki!**  
**((Refer to romano's blogs. xD))**  
**Okey, so, fem!Loki, **  
**1. I'm hot.**  
**2. I'M THE HERO!**  
**3. You aren't hot...Maybe a little.**  
**4. Tell fem!prussia when you see her that I said hiiiiii. **  
**5. STOP PMSING! DAMN. I GET THAT ENOUGH FROM ENGLAND.**  
**buh bye!**

* * *

**((Oh Alfred XD Dis Comment~))**

Loki . . .? _Che Cazzo?_ What the hell?! I'M **NOT** LOKI!

**_That sounds kinda cute.__ :D Loki~_**

SHUT UP CARMEN! DON'T CALL ME THAT!

1) Nope.

2) Wrong Again.

3) I'm sexier than you will ever be, bastard.

4) Tch, whatever.

5) **I'M NOT PMSING DAMMIT!** WHY DOES EVERYONE FUCKING ASK THAT!

Bye. Bastard.

* * *

**_Comment from- crazy YingYang writer7:_**

**Sorry I scarred you more by my comment. . .  
I got some questions I'm curious on.  
1) If Spain were to get magically transformed into a 2 year old toddler by eyebrows (England). What would you do?  
2) What would you do if Feli got prego...  
3) Would you rather be traped in a room with France (scream in the background for emphsis)or be trapped on a desert island for a week with NO TOMATOES?  
4) Would you rather list all you're fears right now? Or be stuck in a room with drunk france? you have to be 100% honest if u choose fears.  
5) Who do you hate more? Germany or France?  
That's it at the moment.**

* * *

_Gesu Cristo . . . _These questions.

_Ve, you can do it! :D_

1) . . . I would kill that eyebrow bastard. O-only because that m-means Spain won't be able t-to deliver tomatoes to me! _Si_ . . . That's it.

**_Aww. So sweet.__ :'D_**

2) I would castrate the bastard that got her pregnant.

3) I . . . I . . .

**_What's so bad about Franny?_**

There's a lot of bad things about that perverted fucker. Anyway . . . er . . . I would . . .

_Come on Sorella~!_

Dammit, I would rather be trapped in the damn room! You just don't take away my tomatoes! You just fucking don't. Tomatoes are **the** shit. That doesn't mean I have to do it, right?

4) Another 'Would You Rather'? Shit . . . I'm going to list the fears.

_Sorella! You should choose Big Brother France! He's not that bad! :D_

Okay, I'm-

_C'mon!_

FINE. Iwouldratherbetrappedinaroom withFrance.

**DON'T JUDGE ME.**

5) Dammit, another hard one. I hate . . . the potato bastard more.

* * *

_**Comment from- Fem!America (Randomness Equals Happiness):**  
_

**Hi-hi, Lovina! It's me, the heroine, Amelia F. Jones! (AKA Nyotalia America.)**

**HAHAHA**** YOU SO LIKE SPAIN! I just know it! Lucky me, nobody knows who I like! It's the awesome secrets of being a heroine!**

**But hey! Everyone gets paired up with people they don't like! Believe me, I've seen things by accident on the internet... *shivers* Not a good thing, dude.**

**Anyways I'm curious. Do you really hate Germany? I'm gonna be honest, I've heard of GerIta (I'm hoping you learned what it means!) and after looking it up, it was an awesome pairing, if I say so myself!**

**...**

**...**

***hides behind giant couch, but is still laughing* Don't kill me!**

**Goodbye, Lovi! Say hi to Feli for me too!**

* * *

**((Oh my God it's Fem!America! *squeals* Er, S-sorry . . . she's one of my favorites.))**

Ciao.

_**¡Hola, America! :D**_

I DON'T! DAMMIT! I D-DON'T.

**_Hmm? What was that,_ Lovi?**

N-nothing. Anyway, you like someone . . .? Heh, I'll figure it out. Soon enough.

_Ve ~ GerIta? What was that again?_

. . . You . . . . like GerIta . . .?

_Calm down, ve . . ._

*Goes off to giant couch America is hiding behind*

**_¿Que le pasa a Lovi?_**

_Ciao, America~! Oh! Sorella's looking for you! Something about yelling . . ._

* * *

**_Comment from- Vampchick2010_**

**1) I said sorry lovi-chan. I really like german.  
2. Hi feli-chan.  
3. I already knew he was a closet pervert. i find it hard to believe that you searched his house.  
4. Sounds stressful. How do you manage most of the time?  
5. i am glad. I don't like to annoy people. How is spain?  
6. Have you seen any good movies lately? I personally don't care for romance but there is nothing wrong with them. i love horror and mystery. Also a good fantasy flick is awesome.**

* * *

1) I still don't get how anybody can like that language.

_I think it's nice! :D_

Of course **you** freaking do.

_What's that supposed to mean? D:_

2) _Ciao~ Want some pasta~?_

3) You knew?! And I did search his house, dammit! . . . OH MY GOD. The potato bitch is probably a fucking pervert t-

_Louise is nice, ve!_

I'll believe that when the tomato bitch says something intelligent.

**_That wasn't ni- Ooh~! Butterfly!__ 8D_**

4) . . . I don't even know anymore . . .

5) **_I'm good thanks! How about you?__ :D_**

6) Feli dragged me to watch 'The Lucky One' yesterday.

_Sorella was crying!_

D-dammit! I was **NOT! **I like horror too. It's not really that scary.

**_Lovi always screams when we watch a horror movie togethe__r!__ :D It's cute._**

. . . _Spagna_ . . . You are such an idiot.

* * *

**I'm going to take a siesta. Ciao, bastards.**

_V-ve, but the other Spain is coming_-

. . .

_She fell asleep . . ._

* * *

**((Remember to send in comments by PM!))**


	8. Chapter 7: Worst Day Ever

**((Sorry I didn't update in so long! I don't like how the chapter turned out . . . but whatever.))**

* * *

Lovina woke up from her siesta, hissing at the sunlight coming in from the open window. She sat up and yawned, looking at her mess of a bed. The Italian felt something rough digging into her back, and reached to see what it was.

Her eyes widened as she looked at a bright blue . . .

"WHAT THE HELL?" She threw the . . . '_item_' to some random corner of the room, and it landed on a pile of clothes. Damn . . . she should really clean her room.

Tch, whatever.

"_Sorella_?" Felicia peeked in the room, already used to the huge mess inside. "What was that?" Her bright eyes shone with innocence. They always shone with the same damn fucking innocence. It was like her freaking eyes were never NOT fucking shining. Seriously.

" . . . Do you know anything about . . . t-that?!" She pointed to the bright blue . . . 'object' on the pile of clothes in the random corner of her room. Her sister was too innocent to do anything like** THAT**, right?! Well, she did hang out with the potato bitch . . . but Lovina made sure that she wasn't corrupted by the German!

"Oh!" Her eyes brightened up, and Lovina's stomach tightened with worry. "Well, Big Sister France was here when you were at Spain's house . . ." Feli winced at her sister's murderous look. "B-but only for a while! I think she was drunk or something . . . And she slept over . . ."

Stupid wine bitch. She should've known.

"I thought I told you not to let that fucking bitch into our house," Lovina groaned and stretched, rubbing at her sore neck.

"Francine said she wanted to show me something . . ."

Shit.

" . . . What EXACTLY did she show you . . .?"

"Well, she didn't really show me anything since I told her how mad you get when she's here-"

"Damn right."

"But, she did something really weird . . ."

The older Italian's eyes narrowed. "What. Did. She. Do?" She asked slowly.

" . . . Well . . ." Feli sat next to her sister on the bed, well, tried to, she sat on a pile of clothes and almost fell off, so she decided to stand. She should really get this room cleaned. But, Lovina was lazy (and clumsy), so naturally, her room would be like this. The elder sister hissed as she heard Carmen's excited squeals as she looked for the photo album in her purse. Damn that woman . . . "She grabbed that blue thing . . ." She pointed to the. . . 'thing' and Lovina's stared at it, utterly disgusted. "What is that anyway?"

"Nothing. And? What else happened?"

"Hey, you didn't answer my question!" Feli pouted and crossed her arms.

"I'll tell you later. Go on with what you were saying. Before that Spanish bastard gets here."

"Well, Big Sister France," Lovina shuddered at the nickname. "She took that thingy, and went into your room . . ."

Oh no.

"She said she was going to sleep, but there were weird sounds! I wonder what she was doing . . ."

Oh fucking hell.

"She was . . . in MY room . . . with THAT?!"

"_Si._" The smaller Italian girl's eyebrows furrowed at her sister's horrified expression. "What's wrong, Lovi?"

"**THAT BITCH!** SHE CONTAMINATED **MY **BED WITH HER STD!" The Italian screeched, furious.

" . . . Huh?"

Fuck . . . OH GOD.

"_GESU CRISTO!_" I **SLEPT** ON **THAT** BED! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS?"

"Er . . . No . . .?

"IT'S ALL OVER ME. OHGODNO, OHGODNO, OH. GOD. **NO.**"

"I'll just . . . go to Big Sister Spain now . . ."

Lovina didn't respond. She grabbed all her clothes piles, her bed sheets, and her pillow, before stuffing all in the laundry basket. (It took her about thirty minutes. Ya know, considering the freaking mess her room was.)

"Lovi~" The Spanish woman called from the living room. "What're you-"

"_Vaffanculo!_" She shouted, and grabbed the towel, running as fast as her legs carried her to the shower. She threw her clothes haphazardly on the bathroom floor, and got in, relieved as the water ran over her body. After a good shower, Lovina wrapped a towel around herself and stepped out, relaxed, she quickly dressed, and went to the computer, checking today's blog comments. Hopefully there weren't any irritating questions . . .

**~xXx~**

**Ciao . . . **

**All I want to say is that life is a dirty, sneaky little bitch that deserves to be kicked in the face. **

**Time: 2:20 PM**

**Currently listening To: The Tomato Bitch's damn squealing**

**Mood: Pissed, Irritated, Angry.**

**Subject: Fuck My Life.**

* * *

She sighed and grabbed a simple t-shirt with a moustache on it and jeans, quickly putting them on before getting back on the computer.

Of course, the first comment was from the tomato bastard.

* * *

_**Comment from- Spain (Rizu Roraito):**_

**You know me too well~. :)**

**Si, Carmen, I am your counterpart! :D I look forward to hablar contigo!**

**Me rendi... on telling my Lovi (Romano) not to curse~. :(**

**Oh, I really do want to see them! :D I can show you my Roma's photos~. He was so cute when he was a little niño!**

**I am on my way, and I have some paella. :D**

**-España**

* * *

"_Que estás haciendo Lovi?"_

"CHIGIII~ D-don't do that!" Lovina yelled. After recovering from scare Carmen gave her, her eyes narrowed at the Spanish woman. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Language, Lovi. And I wanted to see you~!" Carmen grinned.

"W-whatever. Just don't bother me."

* * *

_**I look forward to talking to you too~! :D **_

I still don't know how you two can be so damn happy.

_**I'll show them to you~ And I want to see your Roma's photos! Lovi, can I please show him-**_

NO.

_**D: Oh? You brought paella? Yay~!**_

All this happy is making me fucking sick . . .

_**Aww, Lovi, don't be like that! :3**_

* * *

Lovina glared at the Spanish woman, who smiled back at her. The doorbell rang and Carmen ran off to get it, giggling excitedly.

Gesu Cristo.

'_Finally . . . I can have some damn peace.'_

She relaxed, and that was when Felicia came into the room.

' _. . . Dammit. So close.'_

Lovina's eye twitched as she read the next comment, and she hissed as she heard Antonio and Carmen talking excitedly in the living room. As long as they stayed there, everything would be fine . . .

"Ve~ Sorella, Amerika posted a comment~!"

* * *

_**Comment from- Fem! America (Randomness Equals Happiness): **_

**((Aww, Thank you! :D Honestly, I think I fail at the blog, but thanks!))**

**I KNOW YOU LIKE HIM.**

**DON'T LIE TO ME LOVINA.**

**... Wait I don't like anyone! I was just kidding...! Yeah... heh... that's it! *blushes and chuckles nervously***

**Oh, hi guys! Nice to join me behind the couch!**

**Did she say something along the lines of, "I'LL KILL YOU YOU DAMN HOTDOG BASTARD HOW COULD YOU PAIR MY SORELLA WITH THAT STUPID POTATO BASTARD"?**

**If you don't kill me yet, I'll be back to reply!**

* * *

DAMMIT. I DON'T FUCKING LIKE HIM.

I'M NOT FREAKING LYING.

_Hehehe, Ve._

STOP LAUGHING FELI!

_Ooh~ I know who Amelia likes! She likes England, ve! I think . . . :D Or maybe Russia~?_

Does she?

* * *

Lovina smirked.

"Ve? _Sorella_ . . . Why do you look so scary?"

"Nothing~"

* * *

_That's exactly what Lovina said! :O How did you know? Do you have powers, ve?_

I will find you, hot dog bitch.

* * *

" . . . And this is when he got tomato sauce all over the kitchen when he tried to cook!" Antonio showed Carmen a picture of a young Lovino, sitting on the kitchen floor, pouting and blushing. The kitchen was a mess, with tomato sauce everywhere, and some pasta here and there.

"Aww~ so cute!"

"Will you two keep it down?" Lovina shouted from her room.

"Lovi, come on, meet my counterpart! He's so nice~"

"I already met him."

"Come on! Bring the laptop with you~!"

Felicia was already skipping to the living room, and Lovina went there slower.

"Hi Lovina!" Antonio hugged her, and she pushed him away, muttering a 'ciao'. Spain just laughed loudly, and the older Italian rolled her eyes. "I wish my Lovino was here. He loves meeting new people~!"

'_Suuuure.'_

* * *

_**Comment from- Lesvos (Greece's Kitty):**_

**GIEA FEM SPAIN!  
Kitty: I drew a picture *points to turkey's mask that has a Greek flag on it* it makes turkey mad!*Russia smile*  
2p Greece: 2p fem Italy is evil...act like her Felicia!  
2p fem Italy: bastards...  
2p fem Spain:*busy not giving a shit***

* * *

_Ve~? _

Oh God. I can already guess what MY 2p is like.

_Mine is . . . evil, ve? ;_;_

_**Mine doesn't sound very nice . . . D:**_

This Feli is scary enough when she's angry.

_But . . . I can't! I can't act like my 2p!_

Let me handle this . . . Feli . . .

_What is it? :)_

Your pasta sucks.

_**:O**_

_. . . Shut the fuck up, you bitch._

_**I-Ita-chan!? :O**_

There you go.

_VEEE! I'M SORRY! D: I'M SORRY!_

* * *

" . . . Lovino used to wet the bed all the time!" Antonio chirped. Lovina snickered . . . until Carmen said something that made her blush and stutter with embarrassment.

"_Lovina hacia eso también!" _The two cooed over fond memories, and Lovina was trying not to barf at all the happy aura oozing from the Spanish duo.

"Don't tell her that, bitch!"

"Lovi, language."

"I can cuss whenever I damn want to."

Back to the comments . . .

* * *

_**Comment from- Vampchick2010:**_

**1. How are you today? I just finished my third week of school.**

**2. What is your opinion on the Korean language? That is the language I am currently learning.**

**3. Can you help me learn Italian?**

* * *

_Buon Giorno~! _**(Good day.)**

1) . . . France did 'something' on my bed . . . Worst fucking day ever . . .

_You say that a lot, Sorella . . ._

Yeah, well . . .

2) I don't think I could ever understand that language. Or any other Asian ones for that matter.** ((I would take Korean but my school doesn't offer it . . . ;_;))**

_**Good job, Lovi~! You didn't curse a single time in that sentence.**_

So fucking what?

_**Never mind . . .**_

3) _We would be happy to help~! :D_

* * *

Lovina made herself more comfortable on the sofa and massaged her sore back. She had only answered a few comments so far, but the uncomfortable siesta on her messy bed made it painful for her to turn her neck.

This day was getting fucking better each damn second.

" . . . And this was when Lovina went to the beach and the seagull . . ."

"NO!" The Italian woman snatched the picture from the Spanish woman, and put it under her laptop, sighing with relief. That was close . . .

* * *

_**Comment from- LilyPetals002:**_

**Hey Lovina~! **

**What do you think of Romano Self-Cest? You know you and your counterpart together?**

**I think it's really damn sexy.**

**But there isn't enough of it . . . ; _;**

**Goodbye~!**

**P.S: I'm going to tell Lovino about this too!**

* * *

WTF.

**Whatthefuck.**

_Ve? That's weird . . .:/_

_**I think that would be adorable~! You two would be the cutest thing~! :D**_

. . .

_Lovina, ve?_

. . .

_You actually made her speechless . . . :O_

_**Fusoso~! So cute!**_

. . . No that's just . . . wrong . . .

. . .

**((The authoress guiltily **_**supportsthispairing.**_**))**

* * *

_**Comment from- TheBlackPaperMoon:**_

**LOVIII~! I want to give you a hug of evil SOOOO BAD~!**

**You're just adorable! ^J^**

**I feel like by the end of this comment...I'll be dead...*suspiciously looks over shoulder***

**I HAVE A QUESTION! ...Are we friends?**

**That sounds so weird...Considering I just started commenting on this blog... ._.**

**I have an idea! Let's be friends later! 'Cause it's nice to have friends!**

**Almost as nice as it is to have pasta~!**

**I know I'm Italian...But I think I'm southern Italian, 'cause I'm JUST LIKE YOU~!**

**I know it doesn't seem like it, but it's true...My personalities are just messed up...**

**CIAO, LOVI~!**

* * *

Hug of evil . . .?

N-not adorable, dammit!

_**Si, you are~!**_

No, I'm N-NOT.

_That emoticon looks like Russia! :D I want to try it~! ^J^_

_**^J^**_

Idiots . . . Um . . . I don't know you.

_I want to be friends~! :D_

Maybe . . . later . . .

_You're Italian~? PASTA!_

. . . You're just like me? You don't know how many times I've heard that . . .

_Lovi, you seem pretty calm right now, even though Big Sister France-_

DON'T FUCKING REMIND ME. WHEN I FIND THAT BITCH, I WILL FUCKING CARVE MY NAME INTO HER FACE WITH A RUSTY NAIL.

_Ve . . ._

_**What're you talking about, Lovi~? Franny is nice!**_

. . . Ciao.

* * *

_**Comment from- A Random Fan:**_

**HI LOVINA! Can I call you Chi-Chi since your middle name is Chiara~? **

**Anyway, I just want to say that you are freaking badass~! The best Nyotalia character ever~! That's why I stalk you!**

**. . . Let's just pretend I didn't say that.**

**Anyway~ I LOVE YOU! You are freaking sexy. **

**Ciao~!**

* * *

. . . Hello. And no! I hate that name as much as I hate 'Lovi'.

_**But it's cute~!**_

Shut the hell up. And yes, I'm badass_. Grazie. _. . You stalk me . . .? What the fuck?

_Oh! That's why I saw a person stalking us in the store one day! :O_

. . . Carmen was already stalkerish enough . . .

_**What? :)**_

*Ignores* Thanks? And I already know I'm sexy, _grazie_.

* * *

Lovina closed her laptop and lay on the couch, sighing with utter relief. After what happened this morning, she just wanted to relax . . .

"Ooh~ My Lovi and your Lovi should go on a play date!" Carmen squeaked eagerly. The Spanish woman was currently eating the paella Antonio had brought. "This is really good~"

Lovina just groaned. "I'm not fucking five years old."

"Language."

"Whatever."

* * *

**Never have two Spains together in the same room.**

**NEVER.**

* * *

**((I have been so busy lately. I hope you liked my fail of a chapter D: . . . Remeber to PM your comments~! And no, I will not be reminding you each chapter.))**


	9. Chapter 8: Announcement and Vespas

**Hello . . . I know I haven't updated this in a LONG time, but, I've been so busy with school and everything . . . I just can't. Also, I have so many ideas for more stories, and this is preventing me from publishing anything else I want to publish . . .**

**So, even though it pains me to say this, I would just like to say that this story is in a temporary hiatus. At least until Mid-November or the beginning of December. **

**I might just do random blog posts until then, but I won't guarantee anything. Again, I'm really sorry.**

**See ya soon!**

*****Stardust98*****

**And since I can't post authors notes as chapters, here's a little blog post. I'm in a really bad mood, so that's why there's so much colorful words in here.**

* * *

_Buon Giorno_ motherfuckers.

I know I haven't posted shit in a long while, and I have a perfectly good damn reason why.

I crashed my Vespa yesterday! UGH. She was so beautiful . . . Yes, _**she**_. I was fucking pissed. I'm okay, of course, but my heart is in tiny little pieces . . . That Vespa was like my best friend, goddammit! Don't look at me like that! It was Feli's fault! She made me crash it into my neighbor's backyard wall. D: Life sucks Francis' balls. Now my white and incredibly sexy Vespa is gone. :(

. . . Definitely wasn't my fault.

I was most definitely NOT drunk or anything. Nope.

Anyway, I'm in a freaking bad mood, and I don't feel like doing shit. _Cazzo_ . . . I'm just gonna lay in my bad all damn day . . .

To top it all off, my boss saw all the fucking cursing I've been doing on the blog, and he decided to put a new censor system on my account. _Che Cazzo? _I'm not a freaking child! I could curse whenever I DAMN WANT TO. Ugh . . . today is just NOT my fucking day. Yeah, I know what you're all saying right now. 'Hey, Lovi, isn't your boss going to see you cursing again?

Truth is, IDGAF.

So, my boss said he's going to put this censor system into effect TOMMORROW.

. . . That's pretty much it.

**HASTA LA PASTA BITCHES.**

**~Lovina Fucking Vargas/ Romana**

P.S: Just to make this clear, it was **FELICIA'S** fault, alright?

* * *

**EDIT: I decided to be nice (even though I'm so angry right now) and answer your responses from last chapter.**

_**Comment from-Spain (Ayamari Uta):**_

_**¡**__**Fue muy divertido! I should go to your casa more often Lovi~. I think I will go to my counterpart's casa too! :D**_

_**Oh Lovi, I don't think I've said this antes pero... I think you have a genial name! Lovina or Chiara, both names are so cool~! :D**_

_**-España**_

* * *

You jerk . . . don't come over more often . . . _Si! Si! _Go to the tomato bitch's house! At least that means you will leave me alone . . . :/

Chigi! Whatever . . . . bastard.

* * *

**_Comment from-Greece's kitty:_**

**_kitty: 2p fem lovi smokes~ like mr 2p france~ PASTA IS FUCKING AWSOME! DONT DISS IT BLAKA!_**  
**_2p greece:*proud* i taught you well_**  
**_kitty: i taught myself, skase_**  
**_2p greece: DONT YOU USE THAT TONE WITH ME!_**

**_kitty:tone._**

**_2p greece:*glares*_**  
**_kitty: OMAHGOD LOVI LOVES SPAIN~ IMMA GO PLAIN THEIR WEDDING!_**  
**_2p greece: malaka..._**  
**_kitty:*throws knife* bastard!_**  
**_2p greece:* ducks* HAHA!*gets glomped by flying 2p turkey* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO¡!_**  
**_kitty:*is about to throw 2p romano*_**  
**_2p greece: no. im fine with this thing hugging me. i dont wanna be raped._**  
**_kitty:*throws 2p romano*_**

* * *

I actually smoke too . . . Even though Carmen doesn't like it. Whatever. Pasta is good, but tomatoes are better.

WHAT? **NO**! I DON'T L-LOVE _SPAGNA_! W-W-WHY DO YOU PEOPLE KEEP SAYING THAT! **CHIGGGIII! **T-THERE IS NO DAMN WEDDING! Dammit!

Wait . . . raped . . .?

Oh yeah . . . My counterpart's 2P is a man-whore.

. . .

Wait, does that mean that my 2P is a slut . . .?

**_Oh Gesu Cristo._**

* * *

**_Comment from-America (Alfred and Mattie):_**

**_AHH! I totally forgot to reply. Whatevs._**

**_Mmkay! So fem!Loki, I have decided that I officially ship you with Fem!Italy and Fem!Germany. :D It's totally awesome! And Spain is probably somewhere forever alone... Whatevs. Peace out, fem!Loki! :D_**  
**_HERO OUT!_**

* * *

Oh _Dio_ . . . it's you again.

I. AM. NOT. FUCKING. LOKI. DAMMIT!

. . .

. . .

. . .

**_Scusi?_**

W-WHAT?

WHATTHEFUCK? **_Che cazzo? _**You ship me with my SISTER and THE POTATO MOTHERFUCKING BITCH?

. . . You are sick.

IT IS **NOT** AWESOME DAMMIT. THAT'S FREAKING DISGUSTING.

. . . I agree. Spagna is forever alone.

BUT STILL.

**I'M NOT LOKI**! I'M NOT, I'M NOT, I'M NOT, **I'M NOT**!

* * *

**_Comment from-TheBlackPaperMoon:_**

_**FUCK YEAH HUG OF EVIL! They is special hugs that only me and 2P!Iggy can give.**_

_**I AGREE! You're adorable as hell. ^J^**_

_**YES! EMBRACE THE EMOTICONS! :D**_

_**Yuh-huh... ._. ...I wanna be friends anyway...**_

_**YAY! I WANNA BE FRIENDS FELI~! I just hope that you don't mind my swearing problems, large assortment of weapons, and the tendency to call people buttsechs...**_

_**I say later is now ._. YAY, FRIENDS! *Hugs the hugs of evil* ...I had to do it...**_

_**FUCK YEAH MOTHERFUCKING PASTA! ... I want pasta now...**_

_**Well, you're just one of the people I'm most like! I'm kinda like a mix of you, Hungary, and America...**_

_**You should do that, Lovi! And you should send me pictures...I like seeing people in pain...**_

_**THIS 'FRANNY' IS A FEMALE RAPIST WHO GAVE LOVI HER STD SHIT!**_

_**That ain't nice...**_

_**...I need to go stare at my homework and not actually do anything...**_

_**Ciao!**_

* * *

2p!Iggy . . .? That's England isn't it? Heh . . . I wonder what that version of him is like.

Chigi! I'm not adorable! N-Not adorable, dammit . . . I'm not . . .

Oh please. No emoticons. Feli already spammed my Facebook messages with them. D:

Sure, guess.

. . . You're insane . . . Well, saner than most fangirls, though.

Okay, okay we can be friends! Just please . . . no hugs. I don't like hugs. -_-

A mix of me, Hungary, and the burger bitch? **Oh hell no. **

I will. :D

**YES SHE IS**. I just want Carmen to realize that her 'friend' is a damn rapist. My bed sheets are clean and STD free now.

_Arrivederci._

* * *

**_Comment from-Vampchick2010:_**

**_1. That sucks. I would so move to a new bed if France did that to my bed._**

**2. It is hard to understand the asian languages. I am lucky to have a college that does offer it.**

**3. Grazie, i want to learn so many languages.**

**4. What is being a country like?**

* * *

**((I'll include translations from now on in your responses to help you learn a bit of Italian. I'm still taking it though, so I only know a little.))**

Buon Giorno _(Good Day)_

1) I got a new mattress.

2) I tried to learn Japanese once. It was too hard, goddammit. And I definitely did NOT quit on the first day. Heh . . .

3) _Prego. (Your welcome) _It's good to learn a lot of languages.

4) . . . Dammit. Time to get fucking serious.

Well . . . being a country has it's ups and downs. For one, you have your citizens' loyalty, you get respect (Well, some of us do) and the whole immortality thing. But each of those things have their disadvantages too. Citizens are what make up a country. Without any citizens, countries die off, or so I've heard. And countries also feel the pain in wars, massacres, riots, large shootings, bad economy . . . Any of these things could happen in any moment, and sometimes, there is no way to prepare for the pain sometimes. We don't live the same way humans do, we were raised from birth (However that happens . . .) to protect ourselves. I was taught how to sword fight when I was little. Not because I wanted to, but because I fucking had to.

We also can't really make friends. I mean, we can make friends with other nations, but those friendships sometimes break apart or get ruined because of wars, and disputes. Humans die eventually, so to prevent any grief, we don't really interact with humans that much.

And . . .unlike humans . . . nations can't freaking have children . . . It would interfere with our work . . . And it's just not possible.

I'm not tearing, dammit . . . I'm just . . . allergic to . . . er, stuff, is all.

* * *

_**Comment from-Fem!America (Randomness Equals Happiness):**_

_**LIES.**_

_**ALL LIES.**_

_**I don't like England! ... You better not tell anyone.**_

_**Mostly Alice.**_

_**Because she thinks she know I like him. *pssh* She be acting so cray-cray. *cough*Even though she's right.*cough***_

_**Of course I have powers! Heroine powers, duh!**_

_****__**YOU'LL NEVER FIND ME! *does a roll towards a door* HAHA! *leaves***_

* * *

IT'S THE FUCKING TRUTH, DAMMIT!

:) *smirks* Better not tell anyone what?

I KNEW IT! *cough*Blackmail *cough*

You don't have any freaking powers.

YES I FUCKING WILL! *Runs after her*

* * *

**_Comment from-crazy Ying Yang writer7_**

_**Try having a couple of siblings that is a mix of France, America, Poland, Spain, Germany, Prussia, and Russia -; and deal with them every minute of the day.**_

_**How many, if it's even possible to count, times has Spain pulled your hair curl?**_  
_**Would rather have *cough* *cough* with Russia or Germany?*runs to nearest bomb shelter***_  
_***still in the bomb shelter* What did you think when Spain wanted to exchange you to get Veneziana? Did you know about it?**_

* * *

Damn . . . the Bad Touch Trio, the burger bastard, potato bastard, Poland and Russia? . . . It must be hell . . .

Ugh . . . I don't even know how many times Carmen pulled my curl, not counting the times she pulled it on purpose.

N-NEITHER! Russia is a scary mofo and Germany is a fugly potato bastard.

. . . I . . . I was actually very hurt . . . I mean, I know I'm not as pretty, nice, or talented as my younger sister, but when that happened, I felt . . . unwanted . . . like I wasn't good for anything . . .

. . .

Dammit, I'm n-not crying . . . :(

* * *

**Hope you enjoyed~! Bye, bye!**


	10. Chapter 9: Happy Halloween, Bastards

**So, I felt like being nice to you wonderful people and posting a chapter~! I have a surprise for you guys soon~!**

**By the way: (This is the key for the censor system thingy.)**

***Shave: Shit.**

***Fudge: Fuck.**

***Fudging: Fucking.**

***Crab: Crap.**

***Hat mole(s): Asshole(s).**

***Darn: Damn.**

***Darn it: Dammit.**

* * *

**Ciao. **

**I just felt like updating today. **

**Halloween is coming up, and Feli wants me to dress up as a bunny. What the hell? That's probably the most stupid thing ever. But don't tell her, of she'll fucking whine until I do it. Fuck. I don't know what to do.**

**Now I have to take Felicia trick or treating later, or my boss won't give me the money to-**

**Shit. My boss said he'll put the censor system right now . . .**

**Wait a minute.**

**. . .**

**. . .**

**. . .**

**. . .**

**. . .**

**. . .**

**. . .**

**. . .**

**. . .**

**. . .**

**Let's try this *shave out.**

**Wait. What the heck?**

**It automatically corrected me . . . **

**Oh no.**

***Fudge.**

**. . . I hate my life.**

**Anyway, I'm going to try and not cuss for the rest of this blog post . . . As I was saying, I have to take Feli trick or treating later, or my boss won't buy me a new Vespa. How Feli got him to do that, I don't know. Now I have to wear *fudging bunny ears. *Crab. I forgot I can't cuss . . . Hold on a moment, I'll be right back.**

**. . .**

**. . .**

**. . .**

**Oh *shave. I think Feli saw what I wrote. Now I definitely HAVE to wear those stupid *fudging bunny ears! At least I don't have to wear a bunny suit . . . *Shudders***

**I guess that's all. Wait, we have comments.**

* * *

**_Comment from- LilyPetals002:_**

**_Hey Lovina~! What are you gonna wear for Halloween? Is it going to be sexy? ;3 And if it is sexy, who are you wearing it for? Spain? Prussia? America? Romano himself? So many possibilities~~!_**

**_*~Lily~*_**

* * *

Well, apparently I'm going to be a *darn bunny. And of course it's going to be *fudging sexy. I'm the one wearing it after all. I'M NOT WEARING FOR *FUDGING ANYONE. NONE OF THOSE *HAT MOLES. ALRIGHT!? I DON'T LIKE ANY OF THEM. _Capsice? _(Understand?)THERE ARE NO *DARN POSSIBILITIES. /

* * *

**_Comment from- Vampchick2010: _**

**_To author, grazie._**

**_1. Wow, being a country is tough. The sword fighting sounds awesome; too bad you had no chance to be a normal kid. Friends are really important, it is a shame that you can't really make friends._**

**_2. How come you love tomatoes so much? I am curious; did Spain have anything to do with it?_**

**_3. *hugs* you need one. Nations can't have kids? That is un-awesome. The world is so unfair._**

**_4. Grazie for answer my questions._**

* * *

((You're very welcome~!))

1) Yes it *fudging is. Yeah . . . Well, at the end of the day, most of the countries are friends. MOST.

2) Alright, to answer your question, I'm going to have to tell you a bit of history and *shave. Anyway, tomatoes originated in America, (Hard to believe, since that hamburger _idiota_ has *shudders* c-canned tomatoes . . .) then the tomato bastard spread them all over the world, first bringing it to his colonies, (Me) I didn't really taste it until a while later, because my people used them as *fudging table decorations. But, yeah, it was because of that jerk.

3) *Hugs awkwardly* _G-grazie. _And yeah . . . it kinda s-sucks. Excuse me for a moment . . .

. . .

. . .

. . .

. . .

Sorry about that, my a-allergies were acting up.

5) _Prego_. (Your welcome.)

* * *

**_Comment from-The Black Paper Moon_**

**_...YOU CRASHED YOUR OWN VESPA. You should be ashamed forever. Forever ashamed._**

**_He's awesome. Awesome like...Me. Hehe._**

**_YES YOU ARE. YOU'RE ADOWABLE LIKE BABEH UNICORNS~~~!_**

**_...You just used an emoticon..._**

**_YAY! We're friends. And now I'm happy. Yay._**

**_I was just kidding...Although I do have swearing problems. And I like singing to the giant kitchen knife, yep. I like biting the body parts off the gummy bears before I eat the rest, too. And England looks dead sexy in mini-skirts...What was I talking about?_**

**_*huggles* YAAAAY! ~~~ I WUV YOU, LOVI! In that non-romantic-but-totally-friendly-and-Prussia-level-awesome way, yep._**

**_And there are others...Namely England, Russia, France, South Korea, Prussia, and maybe a tiiiiiny bit of Belarus._**

**_YAY! Franny's face won't be so pretty anymore...Hehe. And it'll have your name on it. :) Paris will be forever scarred..._**

**_Good...I wouldn't want France anywhere near my bed...*shudder* What if the male France and your France...Teamed up? D:_**

**_I love you...*blink*...Okie bye._**

* * *

I-I didn't crash my Vespa! It was Feli's fault . . . ! She . . . uh, distracted me . . .? Yeah! I was NOT drunk. At all. It was all Feli. I most definitely, positively DID NOT, I repeat, DID NOT, drink wine before getting on my Vespa. Nope. Feli's fault.

NOT ADORABLE! And unicorns don't exist, dammit.

N-No I didn't! I never use emoticons . . . *looks away nervously*

. . . Whatever . . . *is secretly happy on the inside*_  
_

. . . You are insane . . . England and a mini skirt . . . !? What!?

*Huggles back awkwardly* . . . Yeah, yeah.

Damn . . . Wait, what!? France!?

Well, I did kick her ass, but Feli wouldn't let me carve my name into her *fudging face . . . *Darn it.

Oh *crab. If both Frances teamed up, *whispers* I was never herrreeee.

. . . Okay . . . _Arrevederci_ . . .

* * *

**This censor system is getting me mad . . .**

**That's all I guess. Ugh, ****_ciao_****. I have to go trick-or-treating with Feli now . . . Wait, who are yo- HAYSV37%762**

* * *

**Ciao~ I'm am what you would call, 2p! Romana~! Call me Katarina. Or Kate-chan~ I simply cannot wait to receive questions from all you lovely reviewers! :D You can also send questions to 2p! Fem!Spain, or Isabel.**

**_Hola . . . Please get her away from me . . . ._._**

**Haha~ You're so funny, Isabel~ Isn't she a dear? So send in all your questions. Oh, and don't worry about Lovi, she's just a little 'tied up'. Hehe~! :3**

**~2p!Romana/Katarina Vargas!**

**_-2p! Fem! Spain/Isabel Hernandez Carriedo._  
**

* * *

**((Alright! So tell me if you guys want a chapter with Lovina trick-or-treating. If not, then guess what!?**

**IT'S 2P! ROMANA TIME~! **

**So, 2P! Fem!Romano will be called Katarina. Just 'cuz that's Fem!Romano's other possible human name. Okay? Okay. Send her questions and stuff~! But remember, I won't update for a while, and this story is still in hiatus, soooo yeah . .. **

**Goodbye~!**

**P.S: If you read this, put 'Monkeys like Peaches' at the end of your review.))**


	11. Chapter 10: 2p! Trouble

**I'm back with Lovina's blog, which is NOT in hiatus anymore~! :D But, I will only be doing 20-25 chapters, so yeah.**

* * *

**_Ciao_ everyone~! Katarina here, with the lovely Isabel;**

_**HELP ME. ._.**_

**And the dull, and less good-looking 1p! version of me, Lovina.**

_Bitch, I swear, if you don't untie me right now, I will cut your hair off and glue it to your fucking moustache._

**What? I don't have a moustache- Wait . . . are you . . . insulting me!?**

_Took you that long to figure it out? You're even stupider than I fucking thought. _

**Now, now Lovi~ You better behave, or you know what will happen! :) **

_**. . . If I were you, I would shut up.**_

_Screw you! No one tell-_

**Loooovi~ :)**

_. . ._

**Anyway, me, Lovi, and Isabel are going trick-or-treating! Isn't that exciting~? Lovi looks so cute dressed as a bunny! :3**

_. . . Oh, yeah, my boss removed the censor system after uh, something happened._

**Now, let's respond to your comments!**

* * *

_Italicized text: Lovina_

Normal text: Katarina

**_Bold and Italicized text: Isabel_**

* * *

**_Comment from-Vampchick2010:_**

**_Did your boss buy you a new vespa? what color did you get?_**

**_What did Feli dress up for halloween? I was a gypsy/witch this year. _**

**_your allergies act up a lot. it is just something that i noticed. * pretends not to know what really happens* _**

**_i am curious what is your opinion of anime? i personally love it but then again that doesn't mean much coming from a fangirl._**

**_sorry if i am bugging you. *hopes not being annoying_**

* * *

Well, hello~! Lovi, looks like you got some questions~!

_. . . Don't call me Lovi, dammit! Hell yeah, he did. It's red now. A beautiful and sexy, red vespa. _

_Feli dressed up as a fairy princess for Halloween. I don't fucking know why, but she did. And dammit, I wanted to be a gypsy . . . er, you know, if I WANTED to dress up, which I d-didn't._

_S-Si! They do, I don't know why though. It's, er, annoying, dammit!_

_Well, I'm pretty neutral about it, I mean, I haven't really watched it a lot. I HAVE been to a few cons and stuff, but I haven't really gotten into any anime. Well, except for this one Feli introduced to me . . ._

What is it? :3

_P-Peach Girl . . . BUT DON'T TELL FELI I SAID I LIKE IT!_

I love that anime~! It's so awesome!

_*sigh* . . . And no, you're not bugging me._

* * *

_**Comment from- SaySaeri:**_

_**Haha! Takeover! How'd you do it Katarina?!**_

* * *

_Don't call me that . . ._

Was distracted, and I came up behind her and threatened to grope her if she didn't surrender~! Then, I got Isabel here to tie her up! :D

* * *

**_Comment from- Ravenhalliwell666: _**

**_Hey chica.  
_**

**_2p Romana. So described which 2p countries you have slept with? How was your life growing up with Spagna? Why are you a whore? What _****_is your view on _****_the 2p bad touch trio?_**

**_2p Spain what was the pirates days with England like?  
_**

**_Raven_**

* * *

Ciao~!

Well, I've slept with America, 1p! France-

_Che diavolo!? You're disgusting! Wait . . . *looks at reviewer* Why does your name have three sixes at the end!? O.e_

. . . Isabel of course-

_**She's lying. LYING. :/**  
_

. . . Aaand, that's all I can remember for now.

_Mio Dio . . . My 2p! self is a France copy! :o_

Well, life with Spagna was pretty sweet! Killing people with Isabel was fun! But, I don't understand why she pushes me away! It hurts my feelings . . . D:

_Gesu Cristo, save me from this crazy cagna please . . . _

The 2p! Bad Touch Trio? Hm, I like them! Though I wish they'd loosen up more . . .

**_It was __pretty insane fighting against a poison-cupcake-making lunatic with pink hair and a teal bowtie. And I still can't believe she fucking kicked my ass. My ship was better compared to her rainbow throw up. Mierda . . ._**

* * *

**_Comment from- Prussia (xXxXLucipideXxXx): _**

**_(As Prussia)  
Scheiße! It's creeping mein awesomeness out to see something that you wrote not containing swears! O.o  
Hey, you know Rod-dick's Nyo! self right? Is she a prissy hündin like our Heta-prat...? Kesesese!_**

* * *

_Oh Dio . . . it's you. Well, Nyo! Prussia says hi . . . and that she is way more awesomer than you._

_WHAT!? I don't swear ALL the time . . . Right?_

Well . . .

_Shut it, no one asked you._

_Anyway, yes I know Nyo! Austria. She's a prissy bitch alright. I just want to smack her sometimes._

* * *

**_Comment from- Greece's kitty:_**

**_2p romano: ciao sorella~ you have isabel with you? thats fabulous! She sounds like espange~  
2p spain: *sweatdrop sweatdrop*so they got you too, isabel?  
kitty: OHMAHGAWD MORE EPIC PEOPLE! HELL YEAH! imma call you Katie. HAHAHAHA THIS IS AWSOME! we can be like bffl's right flavio!?  
2p romano: si~  
kitty: YAY!  
2p spain:...someone... please... help me...  
kitty: hey katie! whats 2p fem greece like? is she awsome like nico?!ISSHEISSHEISSHE!?  
2p greece:*throws book* SHUT UP  
kitty: *dodges book and it hits 2p romano* LOVE YOU TOO, NICO!_**

* * *

**((ERMAHGERD I SORRY I FORGOT YOUR COMMENT ADFGHJKL-))**

Ciao, fratello~! *hugs* I know right? I wish she'd lighten up a bit . . .

**_Si . . . ayudame . . . help!_**

Si, si we can! I love making new friends!

**_Oh Dios . . . _**

She is~! I have lots of fun with her shopping and killingpeople. But, whenever I ask her to come to my house, she says no! I don't understand why, I just want to 'spend time with her'~~! :3 *perverted wink*

_Ew._

*watches as book hits 2p! Romano* Are you okay, fratello?

* * *

Well, me and Isabel are leaving now. We will come back to you lovely reviewers though! Goodbye Lovi!

_Bye . . . *mutters* Stupid bitch._

What was that? :)

_Nothing!_

I thought so.

**_Adios, everybody._**

* * *

**Sorry I couldn't do the trick-or-treat chapter guys! BUT, I'm definitely doing a Christmas chapter.**

**Comments, anyone~?**

*****Stardust98*****


	12. Chapter 11: GETTING A NEW CAR

**((I'm kinda changing the formatting of the blog, so yeah, it won't have that many lines anymore. XD))**

'**SUP BITCHES.**

**GUESS WHO'S GETTING A NEW CAR?**

**THAT'S RIGHT, I AM.**

**YEEEHHH!**

**ASDFGHJKL;'**

**Ahem.**

**Anyways, so my boss told me that I've been doing a good job with the paper work, so I 'm getting a new, sexy, red car. AND I CAN CHOOSE. FUCK YEAH.**

**So I'm getting aN Alfa Romeo 8c Competizione. **_**SEXIEST CAR EVER. **_**GOOGLE IT.**

**Alright, none of the comments better spoil my good mood.**

**About the 2ps, they said they left, but I have a feeling they're in my house somewhere . . . Fucking idiotas.**

**Time:** 8:00 PM

**Currently Listening To: **I Feel Good by James Brown.( I don't know who the hell he is, but Feli recommended this song to me, said it cheers her up when she was sad. IT TOTALLY FITS MY MOOD.)

**Mood: **HAPPY AS FUCK.

**Subject: **_MIO DIO_ I'M GETTING A NEW CAR!

_**Comment from- Prussia (xXLupicideXx)  
Sucks to unawesomely be you, Looooovvvviii! Kesesese! XD Hmmm, since you don't seem to like Nyo! Austria; I'm guessing that you don't like Rod-up-the-ass either? If so, that's awesome!  
Und also, a message to Nyo! Prussia:  
Fick du, hündin! Ich bin so mehr ehrfürchtigen als du! Geh und essen scheiße!**_

**Reponse:**

Tch, it doesn't suck to be me! I'm getting a new fucking car! It doesn't matter if F-Feli's getting two, even if she doesn't do shit . . . BUT she chooses the shitty cars anyway . . . It's better that way, less money would be wasted when she crashes it.

_Nyo! 2p! Romana: Well, ciao! Aren't you cute? *winks*_

_**Nyo! 2p! Spain: Ugh . . .**_

Hey! Get the hell out of here! Out!

_Mio Dio . . ._

Anyway, nope. That stupid aristocrat with all his fine dining and he needs to shut the fuck up and go hump that fucking piano he loves so fucking much.

I'll tell her what you said tomorrow. If I feel like it.

_**Comment from- SaySaeri**_

_**Thanks for answering my question! XD I wonder why Spain removed the censoring?**_

**Response:**

_Prego._

Actually, _Spagna _isn't my boss anymore, but I still tend to call her that (sometimes). But yeah, she removed the censoring because I, er . . . t-threatened her! Yeah, ITALIAN BADASSERY.

It exists!

. . . I-It does . . .!

_**Comment from- Ravenhalliwell666**_

_**Lovina,  
I pity and feel for you. Here are two dozen tomatoes and a dozen of our states best apples. Btw, this is Rain Jones AKA Western Washington State. Nice to meet you all. Lovina what is your fave weapon? If it's a gun what make and model. Personally I think you're badass. Just because you can't stand idiotas and bastardos just means you don't buy peoples BS right?  
2p Romana, I dare you to sleep with all of 2p Europe and live to tell the tale. That's a favor from me to you logins to get her the hell out of your house.  
2p ****España****, why did you keep her in the first place? Doesn't sound like you like her. Eh no shame in losing to Artie. He's fucking psycho. What's your opinion on 1p bad touch trio and your version? Describe 2p France and Prussia please?  
Until next time. Hang in there Lovina!  
Rain Jones  
-Personification of western Washington State**_

**Response:**

_Grazie. _*munches on a tomato* . . . Eh, I'll put these apples in the pantry later . . . _Ciao,_Rain. Wait, are you one of America's daughters? How the hell did that idiot have you guys? Did he and Nyo! America have sex or something?

Anyway, my favorite weapon? I have a few guns, but not like that psycho bitch Switzerland, who better not be reading this or I will have to go into hiding, crap. My favorite though, is a concealed hand gun I hide in my pocket. It's a Walther PPS 9mm. Not only is it lightweight, and easy to use, but can shoot up to 6 or 7 rounds. And, it's easy to hide! Heh, that potato bastard won't see it coming when I finally end him . . .

Ahem. Er, _si_, I AM badass. And also-

_2p! Nyo! Romana: Hello Lovi~ Me and Spain here decided to stay with you~! :D_

_**2p! Nyo! Spain: She decided. Not me.**_

_Your reviewers love me! :)_

Cazzo! Not you bitches again! Damn, I thought I got rid of yo-

_What were you about to say? 8)_

N-Nothing. Heh, u-uh, yeah, I don't buy people's fucking bullshit. Oh, look who's got a question~

_You used a tilde~! :D_

Why is that such a surprise to everyone?

_Oh! You want me to? Haha~! I already have, darling!_

_**What!? :O**_

You fucking slut . . .

_Are you jelly Spagna?_

_**N-No . . . :(**_

_Ooh! I can answer this one! She kept me, because no matter how many times she pushes me away, she loves me very, very, VERY deep down. In her cold, cold heart. :D_

_***sigh* Yes . . . And yeah . . . Inglaterra (England) is fucking crazy. With those stupid cupcakes . . . About the Bad Touch Trio, I don't like the 1p BTT. They are all idiots, including my counterpart. The 2p! BTT are a bit better, but I still don't like them much. 2p! France is grouchy all the time, and hates being around people. And 2p! Prussia is all shy and timid, but fierce when she wants to be.**_

_Ciao_, and _Grazie di nuovo._

_**Comment from- Romano (YouFall9Times):**_

_**...  
What the fuck is this?! My feminine version is doing a blog post?! Heck no! You! Get out of the computer now, cagna! You are getting on my f**king nerves just by posting this s**t! Last time we saw each other we said not to meddle in the f**cking business of each other. Now, you are inviting the tomato bastard and everyone over to your house! T-Though, it's not like I care that the potato bastard isn't here, damn it! But you are making Feliciano act weird, damn it! Stop this s**t right now, bastarda!  
Non sto cazzo di porre fine a questo con l'amore o qualcosa di simile merda,  
Your f**king counterpart,  
Romano, damn it!**_

**Response:**

_Hmm . . . I wanna meet Romano! *smirks*_

HELL YEAH I'm doing a fucking blod post? U MAD, BRO? And I'm not getting off of the computer Romano, we went over this, you don't control me! I don't give a FUCK if I'm getting on your nerves! Well, too fucking bad! Yeah, I invited him over, glad you can read, want a cookie? You do care the potato bastard isn'there, don't you? I wonder why . . .? *sarcastic* Pray tell dear, how am I making our dearest fratello act weird? AND I WON'T STOP, STRONZO!

Kiss my ass,

-Lovina Chiara Fucking Vargas.

_**Comment from- Greece's kitty:**_

_**2p greece: she is possibly more perverted than you.  
2p romano: isnt it wonderful! Sorella learned from the best!  
Kitty: YAY! Killing people is fun. HUUUUU-next time we should take nicolleta with us when we go kill people, katie!  
2pfemgreece: ...**_

**Response:**

_Si, fratello! *giggles* :D And killing people is fun! You guys are the coolest!_

_**Oh no . . .**_

Oh Gesu Cristo . . . you are ALL insane.

_**Comment from- Vampchick2010: **_

_**Gypsy is a cool costume. Shame u didn't get to be that.**_

**_Grazie, for not thinking I am annoying. i always worry about that._**

**_Peach girl is one anime I started but never finished. Was it a good anime?_**

**_Lol Feli as a fairy princess. Did she make Germany dress up in a costume too?_**

**_Are you excited for Christmas? i personally can't wait._**

**_How do you relieve stress? i am always stressed lately and can't seem to find a way to get rid of it._**

**_Ciao, Lovi-Chan._**

**Response: **

I know right! I probably would've looked sexy too, if it wasn't for my _sorella._

_Yup, you should've have worn it. ;)_

Perverted bitch.

Sorry about that, but a CERTAIN 2p! counterpart is being ANNOYING.

_Prego. _(Your welcome)

*Doesn't want to admit that it was great* I mean, it's an okay anime . . . But not amazing . . .

_Si_, she did. He dressed up as a knight. Haha! That was the funniest thing I've EVER seen.

I'm excited for Christmas too, n-not just because I spend it with _Spagna_, b-but er . . . yeah . . .

I basically just do what I enjoy. Being a lazy-ass person and eating tomatoes. Just do what you enjoy and maybe you'll relax? Or try focusing on one thing at a time if you have a lot to do.

_Arrevederci. _(Goodbye)

**I'll see you tomorrow. Going to take my NEW CAR for a spin.**

**Hasta la pasta motherfuckers.**

**-Lovina Chiara Vargas/ S. Italy Romana**

**(( Please PM me your comments! I don't wanna get reported!))**


	13. Chapter 13: Buon Natale!

**((Last update until after New Year's~!))**

**Dammit! Someone help meeee! I can't get away from these bitches!**

_2p! Romana: You know you love ussss._

_**2p! Fem! Spain: . . . I feel like killing someone today.**_

**. . . So er, *looks nervously at the knife Isabel is holding* I like your . . . er, outfit.**

_**I'm not going to kill YOU.**_

Oh, okay-

_And what about me? :)_

_**. . .**_

**Er, anyways, here I am, preparing for the fucking Holidays. I probably won't get shit . . . I usually only get presents from the two 1p! Spains . . . my counterpart, and of course Feli ALWAYS gets me something. All I want for Christmas is . . . Hmm . . . A bigger tomato garden, the potato bitch's head on a silver platter, and a rocket launcher. Only then will I die a happy bitch. :)**

_I will be happy when Isabel and me do the-_

_**Shut up.**_

_I didn't get to finish! D:_

_**It was probably something perverted.**_

_. . . So what if it was . . .?_

_***sighs* I fucking knew it.**_

**So, Feli says that she has a surprise outfit for me to wear, but I'm going to buy back up clothes . . . just in case.**

**Um, Happy Holidays I guess.**

* * *

Lovina moved on to the comments, unsure of what more to write. She glared at Katarina, who just smiled back and batted her eyes in fake innocence. She growled threateningly, but decided not to do anything to her annoying counterpart. After all, it was almost Christmas, and she was supposed to be spreading joy and rainbows and shit. She adjusted her Christmas hat, which kept falling off.

"Alright, let's see . . ."

* * *

_**Comment from- Greece's kitty:**_

_**Kitty: we aren't insane. Were just SEXEH.  
2pfem Greece: killing people pleasures me. You 1ps are so boring.*eyes flash red* I don't like being bored.  
Kitty: OOOOOHHHHHHHH LOVI, YOURE GETTING A NEW CAR!? That's awesome. Just don't let your sister drive it...  
2p Romano: sorella! Guess what!**_

**Response:**

_Yes, we are! :D_

_**No, you're not. **_

_Oh, please, Spain, you're sexy too . . . *smirks* in bed. ;)_

Keep ALL perverted comments to your fucking selves, dammit!

_I know right? Killing people is so fun~ *giggles* ;D_

You . . . I don't even know anymore . . . And si, I will NEVER let my sister drive my sexy _Fiamma. _(Flame)

_**You . . . named your car?**_

Hell yeah.

_**What has this world come to?**_

_What is it, fratello? :)_

_**Comment from-Ravenhalliwell666:**_

_**Ciao Lovina,  
Hahahah! Interesting theory there although I think that's technically called masturbation but whatever. I think we are the same as countries in the sense we just appear as things shift within America. Sadly, I'm one of the younger states but that doesn't detract from my awesomeness! Oh crap! I think I've been spending too much time with Gilbert. I'm glad you got a new car. Take good care of it and not wreck it.  
I have an evil idea to get those two out of your house. It might require the help of your male counterparts and both Spain's, male and female and is a bit risky. (Hide the next part from the 2p): Since Christmas is coming up; why not give Nyotalia España to 2p you as a gift. II recommend tying 2p España up at her home and sending a card to 2p you stating that España has a present for her and direct her to Spain's house. Good idea, no? I anticipate this will give you a few days free of them. Just an idea! Tell me how it goes.)  
I have my own fic where I'm taking letters from states as well as countries so send me questions if you have any.  
Lovina, as the Mafia's boss, do they respect you or do they look down on you because you're female? What was their first reaction when they found out? I'm sure you proved to them you're not one to be effed with just because you're female. So what are your plans for Christmas? Any gifts you want? If it makes you feel better, I bet your 2p self sleeps around because she tries to compensate for the attention that is spent on her sister obviously she has issues and is a nympho. You're the better half obviously.  
2p S. Italy: So basically you're the female 2p version of 1p male France? That's kind of disturbing. What are your thoughts on 2p Germany and 2p Feliciano, the male and female versions. What are their personalities because I've heard that 2p Male Feli is very scary and violent and basically 2p Germany is his bitch? Is this a correct estimate? Instead of asking you which nations you've slept with, let me just ask which ones you haven't slept with? What are you or opinions on 2p male japan? I've had an interesting encounter with him and he seems similar to you in terms of personality.  
Hope they leave you alone soon Lovina.  
Good luck. If you ever need any help, I have a husky who will chase them away for you or try.  
Rain jones, over and out.**_

**Response:**

_Ciao_, Rain.

Ah, that's true . . . So . . . there are fifty of you? Damn . . . Of course I will take care of my new car! And I won't let Feli fucking drive it, dammit!

That's . . . actually a pretty good damn idea . . . Though, I don't want my 2p! self to molest Spagna . . . Yes, I care about the tomato bitch.

_Aww! That's so sweet, Lovi!_

Shut the fuck up! A-Anyway . . . I'll try it out and tell you how it goes soon. And alright, I will.

The Mafia . . .

Well, at first, they didn't really respect me as much I do now because I'm a fucking girl. They respected my _fratello_ (Romano) much more than me . . . But _si_, I showed them that I they fucked with me, they would find their balls promptly ripped off.

_That's right! :)_

*Ignore* My plans for Christmas? Well . . . There IS a Christmas party at America's place, but I don't know if I should go . . .

_I wanna go~! *perverted wink*_

Gifts? Well, a rocket launcher would be fucking amazing . . . And hahaha~! True! Of course I'm the better half!

_Huh? _

_**Heheh . . . :)**_

* * *

Lovina grips her stomach, laughing loudly. Katarina looks at her confusedly, and then at Isabel, who is also chuckling. She tries to look at the screen to find out what they are talking about, but Lovina has somehow covered the comment up. Katarina pouts and looks a bit left out, but then, she manages to take a peek at the comment and sees that she has questions.

* * *

_Hm? I've never really met 1p! France before . . . Sure, I did have a quick conversation with him or two, but I've never really talked to him. Disturbing? What do you mean? Amore has to be spread around~! ;) Well, the 2p versions of Northern Italy are very mean . . . And scary! D: But they can be really nice~! I love my fratello and sorella~ Si, 2p! Germany is my fratello's bitch~! I taught my fratello so well~ Oh, well, just to name a few, Switzerland, Cuba, Russia, Canada . . . 2p Male Japan? Well, he has a bit of . . . anger issues, to put it lightly. But 2p! Feli and he are not very good friends._

I hope so too. And, _grazie_ for the idea.

_Arrevederci~! Hope to see you agaiiin~ :D_

_**Adios . . .**_

Goodbye.

_**Comment from- Vampchick2010:**_

_**I have to be honest here. Your 2p counterpart scares me. She is like another 1p France.**_

Congrats on the new car. Red is such an awesome color.

I would have loved to see Germany as a knight.

You get to spend it with Spain? That must be fun. I am curious, are there any special traditions you do for Christmas?

Thanks for the advice. It helped. My books are the best way for me to relax. Do you read any books in your free time?

Arrevederci.

I mean, I wouldn't have minded if my 2p! Counterpart was some psycho bitch like England's, but why did she have to be . . . like THAT?

_Hey! I'm not that scary . . . (More like sexy~)_

_**She's terrible, verdad? (right?) -_-**_

It's an awesome AND sexy color. And _grazie_. I just hope Felicia doesn't crash it anytime soon . . .

S-Si, I do . . . Well, in Italy, instead of the _ragazze_ and _ragazzi_ (Boys and girls) sending letters to Santa, they write letters telling their parents how much they love them . . . *sniffle* Allergies are acting up again . . .

_In Italy, we also don't really believe in Santa, we believe in La Befana, who is a kindly witch that leaves Italian children presents and coal, much like Santa Claus._

_Prego. _I'm . . . g-glad it helped . . . And _si_, I do . . .

_I read 'books' too~!_

_**Ay, Dios Mio . . . (Oh, My God . . .) Don't listen to her.**_

_A presto._

_**Comment from-Prussia (xXxXLupicideXxXx):**_

_**1. Mein awesomeness meant about getting annoyed by 2ps.  
2. Prächtig frauen like you always seem to be unawesomely underappreciated... Don't get so unawesomely worked up about it Lo-Uh, Romana...  
3. Kesesese~! It's so cute to see you awesomely make fun of Rod-dick! ;D  
To 2p Romana: Hallo sexy! ;) Hmmm, not quite as much of a Bella as Lo-1p Romana! But you seem awesome enough.**_

**Response:**

1. Oh, yeah . . . Godammit, I'm still wondering why yours hasn't bothered you yet . . .

2. You're lucky I don't know that much German . . . And er . . . _si_, _g-grazie_ . . .

3. C-Cute!? I'm not cute!

_You are~! :D_

_What!? D: _

. . . I-I What!? *blushes* I'm not t-that pretty . . .

* * *

Lovina and Katarina stared at the screen, albeit for different reasons. Lovina was blushing heavily, while Katarina was fuming. Isabel just looked at them with amusement.

"W-What the hell . . ." Was the only thing Romana said, before turning to the rest of the comments, still a bit flustered.

* * *

_**Comment from- Sweden (Derp A Thon)**_

_**Hello South Italy,**_

**_My boss is trying to force me to talk to others, and people say we're lot alike, both constantly overshadowed by our brothers._**

**_It feels nice to know someone else understands._**

**_I do have some questions for you. If you wouldn't mind, please answer them honestly. Don't worry about offending me._**

**_Despite your countries unfavorable view on same-sex marriage, what are your opinions on it?_**

**_Do you agree that Mathias (Denmark) should shut his mouth about what he expects women to be like? He's such an idiot!_**

**_Do I scare you? If so, why?_**

**_That's all the questions for now._**

**_I've seen your art before. It's really good._**

**_-Sweden_**

_Ciao, _Sweden . . .

That's the same reason my boss made me make this blog too, and yeah . . . Feli does . . . make me feel like an outcast sometimes . . .

It does feel kind of nice.

Well, about same-sex marriage. I don't mind it. A lot of people in _Italia _don't like it because we're a religious country and all that, but . . . in my opinion, love is love, doesn't matter the race, ethnicity, religion, sex, none of that matters I you really love someone.

_**That was . . . deep.**_

_Yeah . . ._

Sorry about that. Spain and I's 2ps are here . . .

_Si! _You have no idea how much I want to smack that _idiota _in the face! Oh, he says things about what women should be like!? I'm going to kick his ass later. :) He's a dumb-ass.

No, not really . . . I mean, at first you did, but now that I've gotten to chat with you a bit, you're not really a bad guy. Huh, now I get what people mean when they say to not judge a book by its cover.

Y-You've seen it!? Er . . . _grazie_ but . . . it's not that good . . .

_**Comment from- SaySaeri:**_

_**Have fun with your new car!**_

**Response:**

_Grazie._

_**Comment from-Neko Sai-Sai and AKA Andre:**_

_**Sai-Sai: Ciao Lovi-Chan! **__***Squeeeeeee!*  
Nii-chan and I have some questions for you and Feli-chan! :3  
Al (Account 'AKA Andre'): 1. How the /HELL/ do you put up with Veneziana? She seems to be either a wack-job, or on constant sugar rush... I certainly prefer your understandable attitude Lovina.  
Sai-Sai: 2. Would you (censored) Mr Spain, and let him (censored) you with a (censored)!? :D  
Al: -_- I thought I told you to stop talking to France...  
Sai-Sai: *Teary eyes* But Nii-chan! Franny-kun is my friend!  
Al: Fine...! 3. Have you ever thought about Nyo! Spain /THAT/ way?  
Sai-Sai: And 4. Can I haz some yummy pasta Feli-chan, plzzzzzzzzzzzzz!?**_

-Lots of love, Sai and Al! 3

**Response:**

Ciao.

1. I don't know how the hell I put up with her either. And si, she is an _idiota_ . . .

2. WHAT!? I-I . . . NO! WHY WOULD YOU . . . *le blush* I DON'T . . . ARRGHH! NO N-NEVER EVER, EVER!

_2p! Romana: Yes, yes she would! :D_

* * *

Lovina covered her face with her hands, her cheeks getting redder each second. Katarina was cackling loudly behind her, and Isabel was just staring at the screen, her face void of any emotion.

"I w-would never do . . . THAT with . . . t-the tomato bastard . . ." She mumbled.

"Haha~! That was hilarious!" Katarina grinned at her counterpart.

"I really don't know how to react to this . . ." Isabel muttered.

"N-Next q-question . . . "

* * *

3. Nyo! Spain!? No . . . I-I haven't ever . . . *blush* Not at all . . .

_**. . .**_

_Aww! Lovi's blushing~!_

Shut up.

4. Well, Feli's not here right now, but I think there is some pasta . . . *gives pasta*

Er, h-have a n-nice day . . .

**Well, that was . . . interesting.**

_**Yes, it was . . .**_

_It was fun! :D_

**I think Feli's almost home, so I better get ready to cook and stuff . . . Before everyone gets here.**

_Everyone? ;)_

_**Si**_**, and if you try anything, I will slap you.**

_But-_

**And leave you in a ditch.**

_Fine._

_**I'll watch her.**_

**Alright. Well, everyone, er . . . ****_Buon Natale_, _e Felice Anno Nuovo_! (Merry Christmas and Happy New Year's!)**

_Smile, Lovi! _

**Fine. Just this fucking once. :D**

_Aww!_

* * *

She pressed the 'post' button, and shut down her laptop. She closed it, and placed it on the small bookshelf (in her quite messy room).

"Ve~ _sorella_? Are you ready? We have to cook lots and lots of food~!"

Judging by the annoying 've~' sound and the overuse of tildes, that was definitely Veneziana.

"Coming _sorella_. And why do you look so happy?" Feli always looked happy, but right now, her face was practically fucking shining with her bright grin and shit.

"Well, Germany and I slept together-"

Lovina's eyes flashed. "WHAT!? Oh, that fucking potato bastard, I'll kill him! I don't give a damn if it's fucking Christmas!" She looked at her sister worriedly, and her cheeks gained a light pink color. "Did it . . . er, h-hurt?"

"Huh? Oh! Only a little, but then we got all comfortab-" Felicia looked at her older sister with confusion, as Lovina picked up a gun and seemed to be about to leave the house. "Where are you going Lovi?"

"Gonna give someone a Christmas 'present'."

"Okay~! Wait . . . why would you bring your gun . . .?"

"I have to go Feli."

"Wait! I know what you're going to do! _Sorella_! Wait!"

* * *

**((So, MERRY CHRISTMAS GUYS, AND TO ALL A HAPPY NEW YEAR'S! ;D**

**One more questions though. Should I change the rating to M so you would be able to ask ANYTHING? I'm sure Lovi would LOVE that~!))**


	14. Chapter 14: Hangover D:

**((This will be the LAST chapter with the 2ps in it!))**

**Turns out that my stupid sorella only cuddled with the potato bastard. Goddammit. This is what hanging out with France does to you . . .**

**So, America has this big Christmas party, and . . . I went. I don't even know what the HELL happened, but I have this damn fucking hangover and MIO DIO MY HEAD FUCKING HURTS! :O**

_Well, that's what happens when you don't control your alcohol!_

**Uuuugh, shut the hell up . . . Wait, you were there. What the fuck did I do? TELL ME, DAMMIT!**

_Well, you drank lots and lots of wine-_

**I know that.**

_And then, you drank some German beer-_

**I DID WHAT!? WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!? FUUUUUUUU- ;A;**_  
_

_And finally, you gave some people lap dances. Jeez, you should've seen yourself. You were DRUNK._**  
**

**Goddammit! Ugh, let's just get this over with. Where's 2p! Spagna?**_  
_

_Oh~ She said she had to . . . take care of something. She'll be back._**  
**

* * *

**_Comment from- Ravenhalliwell666:_**

_**(Don't know if you understood. I meant give 2p Nyotalia Spain to your counterpart to get both of them out of your place not your tomato bitch. That would be cruel.)**_

_**Happy holidays Lovina!  
Check outside your door. A present should be arriving now. Try not to kill too many nations with it. My gift to you. Another piece of advice. The way to get those two out of your house threaten your counterpart with a chastity belt and to get the 2p esplanade out tell her my previous advice and mention you'll give her a strong aphrodisiac as well before locking both of them in a room for 48 hours. Or give him 2p England as a gift. You pick. Are you gay by any chance? Besides espana who would you be interested in dating or having a relationship with?  
2p Lovina: just a small comment that was not a suggestion. Are you saying you haven't slept with those 1p countries?  
With love and gifts,  
Merry Christmas,  
From Rain Jones  
Western Washington**_

**Response:**

Oh, I see. Yeah, that's actually a good plan . . . except Isabel (2p! Spain) is already here too. N-Not that I care about the tomato bitch.

A gift? F-For me? _Grazie_ . . . I don't really get gifts often. *goes to door, and comes back with a gift box* What is it? I feel kinda bad that I didn't get you a gift . . . Here's some of Feli's pasta. *mumbles* Much better than mine anyway . . . *gives pasta* And _grazie_ for the advice too.

I'm actually bisexual. Love is love, no matter the gender *shrugs* . . . *blushes* I'm n-not interested in d-dating the tomato b-bitch! Well, if I WAS interested in dating anyone, I would probably date Nyo! Belgium. He's pretty cute . . .

_Okay, dear. :) And, si, I didn't sleep with those countries._

Again, grazie, and_ Buon Natale_.

_Yeah, Buon Natale~ :) I'm afraid this will be the last time you'll see us, because we have to depart. Right Spagna?_

_**I'm back. And Si. Feliz Navidad or whatever.**_

_Ciao~!_

_**Comment from- Greece's kitty:**_

_**kitty:YEAH WE ARE! WE ARE SEXEHER THAN EVERYONE.  
2p romano: I GOT A FABULOUS NEW SCARF. AND ITS PINK.  
kitty:...but i liked your blue one...*is ignored*  
2p fem!greece: i havent gone on a killing spree in a while...hmm...killing people is very very fun. and amusing. watching people bleed to death slowly...hearing their screams of pain...hehehe.**  
_

_Hell yeah! :D _

_**Oh Dios mio . . . -_-'**_

_It looks so GOOD on you fratello~! *giggles* Doesn't it, Spagna? The blue one was cute too, but I love pink! :D_

_**I guess . . . -_-**_

*stares at 2p!Fem!Greece, slightly scared* O.O Uhhh . . .

_I know right? *hugs 2p! Romano* Fratello, me and Spagna have to go. But don't worry! I'll be back to bother Lovi!_

Oh no . . .

**_Comment from- Prussia (xXLupicideXx):_**

**_Ja, du bist nicht unawesomely cute... You're awesomely adorable! *Grins and winks flirtatiously*_**

**Response: **

B-Bastard!*mumbles* _G-Grazie_ . . . *blushes* B-but I'm not cute OR adorable! Don't j-joke like that . . .

_Ah, Lovi, are we having self-esteem issues again? :l_

N-No . . . A-Anyway, were you at America's party? I don't remember ANYTHING. I hope I didn't do anything . . .

**_Comment from- crazy YingYang writer7:_**

**_Hello there Romana. _****_Hope you having a good holiday so far. *Looks at siblings with a confuse look for being to quiet* Que diable sont-ils si. . . . . .*hears the explosion from the nieghbor's houses*mierda. . . . _****_*Eye twitches* Sorry about that, I don't like spending with the family because I'm not allow to use any weapons I have against the really perverted one's. . -.-'_****_*hides the mini canon and paint ball gun in a secret area just in case* Its great that you got a sexy red car. I got some questions that I curios about. . . ._****_Are you friends with Canada, either female or male? (Sorry if that question looks wierd to you)._****_What is your all time favorite tomato dish?_****_What happens when I pull your curl?(innocent with a hint of trollish face)_****_Have you ever been arrested?What for?When was the first time you ate a tomato?_****_Happy holidays and I sent you a present in create form. . (Its tomatoes and a other stuff that might help with getting away annoyances for a bit and smoke bombs!). ._**

**Response:**

_Ciao_. Hope you are too. E-Explosion . . .? O.O I hear ya about the perverted _famiglia_ members *Thinks about_ fratellino_ and _sorellina_ Seborga*

Si, I actually am friends with both Canadas. They are actually pretty nice . . . Maddie and Mattie aren't as annoying as most of the other nations, and they kinda understand the whole sibling overshadowing thing, so that's good too . . . My all time favorite tomato dish? Hmm . . . It has to be the _Bruschetta with Tomato and Basil_. They use ripe and fresh tomatoes in it, and it's pretty good.

D-DON'T PULL MY CURL! *shields curl*

_I wanna touch it! :D_

_**You're an idiot.**  
_

I-If you touch i-it, erm, I start . . . feeling er, w-weird . . . Yeah. S-So don't touch it.

. . . Yes, I've been arrested . . . For only a few thing, mind you! And it's mostly because of the stupid Bad Touch Trio . . . Those stupid three bitches. I've been arrested for, er, public intoxication . . . and . . . uh, I may h-have yelled at a cop . . . But he was being unfair, dammit! The first time I ate a tomato . . . Well, that was when Spain brought them from America. At first, they were used as table decorations, but then I tried one, AND IT WAS THE BEST FUCKING THING EVER.

A-A gift? _Grazie_ . . . Here's some of Feli's pasta . . . *Gives*

Yeah, _Buon Natale_.

**_Comment from- Sweden (Derp A Thon): _**

**_That's good. I'm glad to hear that._**

Yes, please do. That Danish idiot will get what's coming to him. Sorry Mathias but, karma's a bitch!

Hello Spain.

Yeah, I have. It's really good.

**_I'm glad. True, never trust a book by it's cover, unless the book is Twilight or 50 Shades of Grey. 50 Shades of Grey was so poorly written that it made me laugh, but Twilight...I could've written a better book by banging my head against the keyboard._**

**Response:**

Stupid bastard . . . Who does he think he is? Well, anyway, I kicked his ass. . . . Do you have to deal with him a lot?

**_Hola._**

*Not used to being complimented* _G-Grazie_ . . .

TWILIGHT. MIO DIO, I cannot COMPREHEND why people read that shit. Don't even get me fucking STARTED on the movie. That stupid emotionless bitch Bella, I don't think I've ever seen her face expression change. And she looks like a drug addict. It annoys me when people are all 'Team Edward!' or 'Team Jacob!'

50 Shades of Grey. I actually went to a bookstore yesterday (On a stroll around Italy) and picked it up, flipped to a random page, and read it (Despite getting weird looks) it was garbage.

**_Comment from- AKA Andre: _**

**_Al: *Starts cackling evilly* Just hurry up and fuck Spagna/NyoSpagna already!  
Sai: *Noms on pasta* Grazie! *Sees Katerina, and starts playing with her hair* Ooooh! Pretty! :3  
Al: *Looks at Katerina* Hmmm, she is nice... Should I take her home and play little brother? ;)  
Sai: *Totally GAY and oblivious* Noooo! I wanna play with the pretty Bella! *Continues to play with hair*  
Al: Tsch, whatever you say bro... *Rolls eyes and then gropes Isabel's butt*  
Sai: *Completely unaware* Question time! :D  
Al: *Sliding hand down to inner thighs and then back up to the butt* 1. What do you think of Prussia obviously flirting with you?  
Sai: 2. Does 2pLovi-chan like pretty blood spatters? :3  
Al: *Still molesting Isabel* 3. What would you do if got super drunk and ended up fucking NyoSpagna under the influence?  
Sai: And 4. Can I haz Mafia gun plz!? *Puppydog eyes*  
Al: *Stops molesting Isabel* /OH HELL NO!/ Don't you DARE give him one! *Starts Kol'ing like Russia*_**

**Response:**

W-What!? I d-dont like the tomato bastard/bitch! I d-don't . . . AND I WON'T FUCK THEM EITHER!

_Aww, so cute! *huggles Sai and giggles* :D_

YES, TAKE HER! You can take her!1!

_***Isabel doesn't notice***_

*Widens eyes at Isabel being molested* What the fuck . . . Eh, whatever.

1. **_Isabel: What the hell? _**

W-Well, I don't know . . . Isn't h-he with Ivan? And I-I er, like someone else. *blush* He's probably just joking . . .

2. _Yes! :3 I like to hear people scream in pain too, it's really fun! *giggles maniacally*_

3. _**Isabel:**_ **_Stop before I kill you._**

_My Isabel! *pouts jealously* Isa is mineee~!_

I can't believe my 2p is like this . . . ! *Blushes harder* I-I don't k-know! Er . . .

**((Authoress: She would like it! :D))**

N-NO I would NOT!

4. *Looks at puppy dog eyes* C-Can't resist . . . *Looks at Al warily* Uuuhh, _mi dispiace_, but no . . .

Oh, and look out, 2p! Spagna wants to kill you.

_**Why the hell did you molest me like that, jerk?**_

Goddammit, freaking hangover . . .

_**Comment from-Scotland:**_

_**Hey thar, Lovina. *winks and smirks***_

((To Stardust: Guess who I am. ;) )

Remember me? *takes hand and kisses softly* England's (cooler) older bruther? Ye have changed since tha last time I saw yer. In more ways than one . . . *looks at chest*

I'll see yer later

Alistair K.

**Response:**

**((YOU. XD WHAT THE- What are you doing here? XDDD))**

Oh, it's you. *rolls eyes, then blushes* D-Don't wink at me bastard! First Prussia, then you? _Mio Dio . . ._

*withdraws hand still blushing* Don't do t-that! You aren't cool at all, b-bastardo! AND MY FACE IS UP HERE! *kicks shins*

Stupid, dumb bastard . . .

**_Comment from-SeñoritaCaliente:_**

**_Hi Lovi! It's Carmen! Just dropping by to see how my cute little tomate is doing! *hugs tightly* You've grown so much! *pinches cheeks* So cute! Tan linda!_**

**_I'll see you later! _**

**_P.S: I almost forgot! *Gives a bear with a cute Christmas hat on it* Feliz Navidad mi Lovi!_**

**_~Carmen_**

Spagna? *blush* L-Let go! And d-don't do that! I'm not cute!

_Grazie_ . . . *Gives present* I drew it. I-It's not that good though . . . *looks at ground* Buon Natale . . .

_So cute! :3_

Shut up!

**_So that's my 1p? I don't like her._**

Yeah, well I don't like my 2p.

* * *

**If ANY of you know what the hell happened at America's party, tell me! I wanna know what the fuck I did.**

**_We'll be leaving now. Bye._  
**

_Bye, dears! I will see you soon~!_

* * *

Katarina grinned and winked at Lovina, before taking Isabel's arm, and dragging them back to wherever the fuck they came from.

Romana meanwhile, just scowled and cue the head desk.

"Ow! Dammit . . . I need some fucking aspiring or something . . . Why the hell did I get drunk . . .?"

* * *

**((And so, ends the visit from the 2ps. This blog will be rated M now, so ask whatever you want~!))**


	15. Chapter 15: Some More Comments

**((Sorry for late update!))**

**. . .**

**I KNOW WHAT I DID ON NEW YEARS.**

**But I'm not fucking telling. **

**I'm already ashamed enough . . . I hope nobody recorded the party . . .**

***is at emo corner***

**. . .**

**Let's just get to the fucking comments.**

* * *

_**Comment from- Sweden (Derp A Thon):**_

_**You have no idea. He likes to pester me a lot.**_

_**You're welcome.**_

_**Seriously. And people call ME emotionless. I actually have emotions...**_

_**Twilight and 50 Shades of Grey are good bonfire material and torture material. I mean, I don't torture people, but it's good to use for blackmail.**_

_**Everyone seems to drink on New Year's except me. That's because 1. I stay away from alcohol. 2. I have Ladonia and Sealand to take care of. 3. I have to deal with Mathias.**_

_**Good luck.**_

_**Ughhh my 2P is here. He's annoying. He never stops talking!**_

_**-Sweden**_

**Response: **

Damn . . . I know how you feel . . . *thinks of Seborga*

I don't think you're emotionless . . . Just that you don't really show your feelings that much, that's all. I've been told that people think all I feel is anger and bitterness. Which is not true, dammit!

Heh, blackmail, huh? Wait, nevermind. I think the potato bitch would probably like 50 Shades of Gray. Dammit! Maybe I could use Twilight . . .?

I should have done the same . . . *knows that she'll probably still drink next time* Or maybe I should just start avoiding parties all together.

_Grazie._

. . . I would rather have a talkative 2p than my . . . rather interesting one.

_**Comment from- crazyYingYangwriter7:**_

_**Hello there Romana.  
*gets the clue and avoids curl then hears the sounds of giggling* What would you do if you were stuck in a room with you enemy wearing a poofy dress, where we (me and my enemy) fight like Greece and Turkey and France and England, but the only way to get out of there is to get along with them? (note to self: kill twin brother later)  
*looks at my siblings suspiciously* What would you do if you HAD to spend a week with Germany in a rabbit hole? (With either female or male)  
What did you think when Spain wanted to exchange you? Did you know about it? This question always bothering me because I have same problem like you. . .  
*feels overshadow and less favored by my twin and younger siblings*  
At least I like you more than your brother and sister representations of N. Italy.  
If you were stuck on an island for a week, would you rather be with Spain, Germany, or Italy and why?  
*looks at twin brother sparkling amber/golgish eyes and looks holding a dress and whispers* ¿Qué diablos estás haciendo? **__**J'espère qu'il sait que je déteste être à lui habille la poupée, la dernière fois il il, j'étais essayais obtiens à partir de mon ennemi ex dans l'horreur.  
**__***Runs 30 miles away from my twin brother with my laptop and other stuff in hands and after a long while*  
Well that took less time than expected for him to lose my trail and I kind of lost track of where to go back home. I never get how he seems to find me easily, even if he is my twin brother. . Sorry if keep switching languages on you, I was taught to learn other languages other than Spanish, English and American sigh language in case of emergencies. . . . . . **__**Almeno ci sono alcune cose buone che è venuto dall'America anche se, come pomodori e l'aria condizionata/riscaldamento.  
why do you all ways hate on Germany? **__**Just out of curiousity.  
How many people have you killed during your mafia missions?  
What would you substitute tomato with if it ran out?  
If you were reborn, what would you want to be named, and would you still be Italian?  
If you were dared to not swear for a whole day would you do it?  
Well that's all I have for now. *shuts off laptop and put it in my bag and feels someone hugging me and turns to see twin brother and says* FML**_

**Response:**

Damn, that's a long comment . . . Ah well.

What? _N-Non lo so!_ (I don't know!) Why would I be wearing a poofy dress? I guess I . . . would get along with the person . . . BUT ONLY to get out of said poofy dress! I hate those damn things . . .

In a rabbit hole!? Oh fuck . . . I would knock the bitch/bastard out for that whole week!

Oh . . . *frowns* Well, I don't like to think about it much, but, I'll answer the question. When Spagna wanted to exchange me, I honestly felt like shit. But I wasn't fucking surprised. Who could blame her? I was just worthless, clumsy and weak back then. Carmen was always nice to me, and I always treated her like shit, so it would make sense for her to want to trade the n-nicer *grits teeth* twin for the . . . other one. But, I guess it's all okay now, because Carmen said that she was sorry for that, but sometimes, I can't help but wonder . . . *face shifts back to usual scowl*

_Grazie!_ And as for you, stay strong! It may feel like no one cares about you, but there's always someone out there who truly does . . .

Hmm . . . Well, definitely NOT the potato bastard/bitch . . . I would choose _sorella_, but . . . I guess it depends. If I were stuck on the island with a bunch of resources and stuff I would choose Feli, but if it was a survival thing, I would probably choose the tomato bitch . . . Just because I have a feeling that my chances of surviving something like that would be higher with her, _capisce? (Understand?)_

O.O . . . I won't ask.

True, some good things DID come from America . . . But much MORE good things came from_ Italia_. So much more.

I'm going to b-be honest . . . I hate the potato bastard/bitch because . . . he/she is the reason Feli doesn't really . . . spend time with me anymore. We barely do anything together now, because they're usually on dates or something . . . I don't mind it much, because I know she's happy, but . . . it would be nice if we spent time with each other once in a while . . . And because I know that PERVERT has a freaking porn magazine stash, dammit.

Pfft, w-what mafia m-missions? *averts eyes nervously* I don't know w-what you're talking a-about!

Nothing, because if tomatoes ran out, it would be the END. No more pizza, no more pasta with tomato sauce on it . . . All of that would be gone without tomatoes! D:

Of course I'd be Italian if I were to be reborn. And if I had to choose another name . . . I like the name Caterina . . . It's a pretty name. Maybe even Chiara . . .

Pfft, of course. *nervous laugh* I can totally do it.

I feel your pain . . . *is reminded of Feli's 'hug therapy'*

_**Comment from- Kunikohime Madoka Tanuki**_

_**Excuse me, cuz I'm a girl too. This year I'm going to 20. i have a problem with my things. u know. period. So to the point. What happen if a girl didn't get a period for 3 month & not cuz of pregnant! So do u know what is it? Cuz that damn thing is happened to me from last year October till now!**_

**Response:**

. . .

Well, this is a . . . strange comment.

Er, well, I don't really know . . . It's normal for girls to not get their period sometimes, but . . . I'm sure it's nothing bad. Don't worry.

_**Comment from-Prussia (xXxXLupicideXxXx): **_

_***Frowns* Nein, /du BIST!/ If only you knew the way Toni always awesomely talks about you Fraulein... To be honest I actually think it unawesomely hurts Lov-Romano to hear Toni sprechen about you like that...  
Und mein awesomeness was waaaayyy too awesomely drunk to remember much! Though the awesome me thinks that Ciar (Ireland) und Franny might have got it on... Kesesese! ;D**_

**Response:**

I . . . *speechless* . . . *sighs* _G-Grazie_.

*facepalm* . . . I didn't know that . . . that stupid, oblivious, Spanish _idiota_. Even though Romano is a douche sometimes, I wouldn't want to hurt him. The stupid tomato jerk-face and I are just friends! And . . . er . . . I l-like someone else . . . *blush* Uh, ANYWAY . . .

Goddammit! Ah well, I know what I did, anyway. *blushes harder and pouts* I swear I'll never drink at one of America's parties AGAIN. *Knows that she'll drink anyway* Ciar and the wine bastard!?Tch, so Feli was right . . . Damn, I feel bad for her. I heard that you slept with someone. Again. *rolls eyes*

_**Comment from- AKA Andre**_

_**Al: I'm not bothered by it... I like 'em kinky! ;D  
Sai: Hai! Nii-chan has an attraction to men and women that would like to kill him... Q-Q Sai-Sai finds it creepy...  
Al: ¡Cállate, estúpido! Anyway... If you don't tell either the bastard/bitch how you feel soon, I will spam your inbox with Germancest porn. That along with your email adress, courtesy of Lupi. (Prussia's author)  
Sai: *Smirks and grabs Al's arm* Sai-Sai thought Nii-chan wasn't into brothers... ;D  
Al: *Face-palm and sighs* For the last time Sai, I'm not going to sleep with you...  
Sai: *Lets go of arm and pouts* Fine... Sai-Sai will just go play dead bunny dollies with One-chan... *Walks off*  
Al: Ok, questions... 1. Are you a virgin? 2. What would you do if I told you potato bitch number one slept with your sorella? 3. What would you do if one day Veneziana asked you to make amore to her?**_

**Response: **

. . . O.O You masochistic pervert . . . Now I find it creepy too . . .

**(( D:)) **Germancest!? What the hell . . .? *Googles it, eyes widen in absolute horror* NO! NO, NO, NO, NOOOO! I think I'm going to be sick . . . Erm, dammit . . . I'll confess! I swear! Just . . . not . . . n-now. *blushes and frowns* But soon, d-dammit! . . . Chigi . . .

*sees Sai-Sai grab Al's arm* Wait wha-? *shakes head* I won't even fucking ask . . . Dead bunny dollies!? What kind of games do you play!? Never mind! I probably don't want to know . . .

1) Pfft, of course not! *laughs nervously, then falters* Maybe . . . *frowns* Okay . . . _si_, I fucking a-am . . *blushes in embarrassment* I d-don't like you.

2) . . . I would stab that potato bitch mercilessly, carve my name into her face, and then throw her in a goddamn lake, after I whack her corpse with Fem!America's bat. *frowns* Wait, they didn't sleep together, did they . . .?

3) . . . Not this 'Itacest' thing again . . .

I would never, ever, ever sleep with her! I would tell her "HELL NO."

. . . Or I might let her down gently, just to not hurt her feelings . . .

But . . . *shudders* That would never happen. Even if I somehow got really, REALLY drunk.

_**Comment from- Fem!Spain (ChurrosSun)**_

_**This is Carmen again! Aw, poor Lovi! I told you not to drink too much!**_

**_. . . Want me to make it better? *smirks suggestively* New Year's was fun, no? *winks*_**

**_*goes back to happy, oblivious self* Anyway, Lovi, why don't you come over anymore? I want to see you! :)_**

**_~Carmen Fernandez Carriedo_**

**Response:**

. . . Yeah, yeah, whatever.

*Mega blush* W-what!? I . . . Stupid . . . GAH! *flails* And what the hell are you talking about? N-Nothing happened b-between us . . . right? D-DON'T FUCKING WINK AT ME, YOU . . . YOU . . . Dammit . . .

The reason I don't come over, idiota, is because I'm very busy as a nation if you didn't know. And er . . . because of some . . . other stuff . . . (Don't ask). B-But if you want . . . I'll come over . . . Just because you won't stop fucking bothering me if I don't! Y-You want to see me? Uh, what I m-mean is, as if I care! Heh . . . Ah, fuck.

_**Comment from- Greece's kitty:**_

_**kitty: aww...the 2ps left...;-;  
Bleh, beer tastes horrible... OUZO IS THE BEST ALCOHOL EVER, DAMMIT! Next time drink ouzo.  
hey lovi, is it bad that im hoping SpaFem!Mano happened while you were drunk?**_

**Response:**

Tch, good riddance . . .

Beer is bad . . . But wine is way better. And ouzo? I guess . . . I'll try it.

. . .

_Oh Dio_ . . .

YES IT IS. IT IS VERY, VERY BAD. NOTHING HAPPENED!

I hope . . .

_**Comment from- Romano (YouFall9Times): **_

_**Who the f**k are you?! Hell no, I don't want to meet YOU!  
Well, for your f**king sake you better stop doing it! Damn you, I know that, you are just so f**king annoying!  
You damn b***h! I am not allowing the tomato bastard to go to your house anymore! I will f**king stop him from going! Maybe that will teach you a f**king lesson!  
I don't care for the damn potato bastard, damn it! I just typed f**king wrong!  
F**k you! You know how! Stop brainwashing him, cagna!  
Shove those damn cookies up your ***,  
Romano**_

**Response:**

*Eye twitch* . . . That was my 2p . . . She's gone now.

*Trying to control anger* Fine . . . I'll stop. If you're so damn jealous you can have the tomato bastard, okay? Pfft, suuuuure I'm the annoying one. Look, if it makes you feel any better, me and the tomato bastard are just friends. Just FRIENDS. I know you love him SOOO MUCH, so I'll back off. And you sir, need to calm the fuck down.

Alright then.

I'm not fucking brainwashing him! I'm teaching him to defend himself, dammit! *scowls* . . . *mutters* No wonder people say we can't get along . . .

I'll shove those cookies up my ass when you lose your virginity bastardo!

_**Comment from- Vampchick2010: **_

_**Hi Lovi-chan, You are so lucky to have a red car. Red is one of my two favorite colors. The 2p's are gone right? *hoping* They scare me.**_

**_I have to say that you are way more awesome than Prussia._**

**_Now I do have a question for you. What is your favorite thing about Spain? It can be either the personifications Spain or Nyo spain (or just the country itself)._**

**_Hey Guess what?_**

**_I am part Spanish. Awesome, right?_**

**_Later Lovi-chan!_**

**Response:**

_Ciao,_ and _grazie_! *sighs stressfully* You have no idea how much your comment cheered me up. Red is my favorite too, along with green. And si, the 2p's are gone, thank God.

HAH, SUCK IT PRUSSIAN BASTARD! :D

Well, I'll do both the country and the personification, if you don't mind. First, the country . . . The country of Spain is actually pretty okay . . . (Don't tell the tomato bitch I told you this!) Well, I do know a lot about the country, since I was raised there and stuff. And . . . it's a nice place to visit. The summers are very hot, but very good . . . It's a lot like_ Italia_, actually, in terms of climate. And most of the people are very friendly. The language is . . . decent *She means sexy*.

Now, the personification. I'll talk about the tomato bitch, since I know her more than the tomato bastard. Nyo!Spain is . . . Well, she's idiotic, air-headed, scatterbrained, a jerk, dumb, PAINFULLY oblivious to her surroundings and a tomato bitch. B-But . . . *blush* She's also actually very . . . nice, and uh, cheerful, and optimistic about things . . . And even if she's oblivious, I know she doesn't really mean to hurt anyone . . . and she's er . . . p-p-pretty . . . NO WAIT! Dammit! Where's the backspace button when you need it!? I didn't m-mean that, I swear!

Part Spanish? That is kinda awesome . . . Can you speak Spanish?

**((The authoress is too! :D))**

And the authoress needs to shut up.

**((Meanie.))**

Anyway, is that why you asked me my opinion on Spain?

Arrevederci!

* * *

**So. I got a dare from this person, saying that I have to be nice (Kinda like Fem! Canada. Yes, I remember her) for three chapters. What do you all think? I think this'll be easy.**

**So, for the next three chapters, you might see me being . . . nicer. *Knows this will be torture* MIGHT. YOU BETTER NOT TAKE FUCKING ADVANTAGE OF THIS!**

**Ciao, bitches.**

**-Lovina Vargas/S. Italy Romana.**

_**((Send comments through PM or review! I accept from OC's, nations, Nyo! Nations, 2p nations, and 2p!Nyo!Nations.))**_


	16. Chapter 16: More Comments

**I know I said I was going to be all nice this chapter.**

**But . . .**

**Feli is here with me . . .**

**This is going to be one HELL of a chapter . . . *blushes and mumbles* **_**I can't fucking believe I'm doing this . . . Ugh.**_

**Let's just get this shit over with, and then I can crawl to my emo corner.**

* * *

_**Comment from- Sweden (Derp A Thon):**_

_**Is Seaborga annoying?**_

_**My problem is that I have a habit of bottling up my emotions because a really long time ago (aka when I was a child) men showing any sort of emotion was considered "weak" and "for girls only" so that's why...**_

_**Yes blackmail. If I have nothing else to resort to, I WILL blackmail people. I have had to do that before. Most of the time I use calculus equations or surströmming.**_

_**Did you know Twilight meets all the criteria for an abusive relationship?**_

_**I don't like parties, so even if I didn't have the kids to deal with I wouldn't go. I get enough of the drunk nations from Germanic family reunions, and I used to live with my alcoholic brother.**_

_**You're welcome.**_

_**I understand what you mean. Mine is promiscuous as well. And has the personality of Poland, Denmark, Russia, America, and Prussia COMBINED.**_

_**...my boss handcuffed me to Mathias for a month. What did I do to deserve this?! I think my boss hates me... *goes to cry in a corner***_

_**It's only been 30 minutes but I already wish he would just stop talking for 5 minutes. And he's asking REALLY stupid questions. And whining about why I won't let him drink beer.**_

_**I fear for what's left of my sanity. -_-**_

_**-Sweden**_

_Si. Mia sorellina_ is a pain in the ass, and a hell of a flirt too. Seriously. But I can't do anything about it, can I?

_But! Sorella Seborga is nice!_

Ah, yes, I remember those times . . . I was always considered odd, because back when girl were supposed to act like they couldn't do shit for themselves, they found it odd that I was aggressive and angry, when I was 'supposed to be all gentle and kind'. Screw that.

_Aww, sorella~_

Exactly. If I can't slap or punch the person I'm mad at, I will try to blackmail them. I haven't blackmailed people to much before, mostly because they know that if they mess with me, they'll get a slap to the face.

_Ve . . ._

Wait, really? How, exactly?

_Edward and Bella are in an abusive relationship!?_

Psh, all I know is that Bella needs to change her expression at some point.

_*giggles* You're funny, sorella._

Damn right Feli. Anyway, Germanic family reunions? You mean you go to reunions full of those (drunk) potato bastards? Geez . . .

_Lovi! Don't call them that! It's not nice . . ._

_MIO DIO_! All those idiots combined!? *gulps nervously* R-Russia . . .!?

_He must be scary! D:_

Now I feel REALLY bad for you. Looks like I'm not the only one here with bad luck . . . If you want, I'll knock him out for you.

_No! Sorella, you've already gotten in trouble (arrested) enough!_

*sighs* I know . . . But I think my boss hates me too . . . I have to do all the fucking paperwork.

_I'm sorry. D:_

No, it's okay. I mean, you can't focus long enough to do paperwork anyway. I might as well stop complaining . . . (But I still think I deserve more vacation time, dammit!)

_Buona fortuna, Sweden, vee! :D_

_Si_, good luck.

_**Comment from- crazy YingYang writer7:**_

_**It's crazyYingYangwriter7, my idiotic twin brother got my laptop and I can't sign up, *mutters curses in a different language* so I had to type some where else. Thanks for the look up. :) *Looks at the other comments*. So, who do you like? * looks at siblings and wonders why I have to baby sit all of them without freedom of going out with friends to the movies when I didnt do anything wrong* so anyway, I take it that your new year didn't go the way you plan? *giving the evil eye to my twin brother and little sister and mutters how evil and some how manage to make mother baby sit them and not how I want to spend my last few days of break I had* sorry for sounding pissy or otherwise, they're driving me crazy to the point where I have to hide to be able be alone for a bit. And I understand now why you hate Germany, I'm like that to if I think that I be forgotten when a friend or family member are dating and they only remember me if they used me or they just remember I'm there while they were having a make out session. *remembering times where my twin brother does that to me*. And I don't know why I am mostly ranting. . . I ask more questions or come back when I cool off and also get my laptop back.**_

. . . I . . I like, er, well . . .

_VE! I know! I know! It's Carm-_

Shut up! Let's just say it's er, someone that's very close to me . . .

NOPE. I got hella drunk and practically acted like a slut at the New Year's party. *sighs* I'm such a fucking lightweight.

_Aww, it's okay! Hug therapy? *hugs*_

I know how you feel. Sometimes, Seborga and Feli both drive me crazy, and make me want to slam my head into a nearby wall.

_. . . D:_

But . . . *mutters* I l-love them . . .

_AWW! I love you too, sorella~_

Anyway! Yeah . . . I mean, I don't mind that they hang out, it's just that I wish she would spend more time with me . . . And sometimes my protectiveness over my family kicks in.

Ciao, hope you feel better.

_Lovi, is it me, or are you being . . . nicer to the reviewers?_

. . .

_**Comment from- Prussia (xXxXLupicideXxXx)**_  
_**So you don't unawesomely like Toni? Gut... Then tell mein awesomeness who you do like, ja? ;)  
*Blushes* Fick du! So what if the awesome me did!? Are you unawesomely implying something fraulein...?  
*Reads bit about dead bunny dolls* O.o?  
*LMFAAO at the response to Romano***_

Nope.

. . . *blushed heavily* I . . . W-Why should I tell you, bastard . . .

_I can tell you who she likes! She likes-_

SHUT UP, FELI!

Anyway, no, no I'm not trying to imply anything . . . Maybe.

_She likes Carmen! (Fem!Spain) :D_

CHIGI! Feli, I will KILL YOU!

_**Comment from- AKA Andre: **_

_**Al: Masochistic pervert? Gracias for the compliment chica. ;) And yeah... Sai has an unatural affection for me. He's like a much fucking nicer version of Belarus, who BTW he idolizes.  
Sai-Sai: Sai-Sai is not allowed to have barbies, so One-chan let's Sai-Sai play with her taxidermy bunnies! *Smiles*  
Al: Pfft! How the hell am I supposed to know if she actually fucked your sister? Go ask her.  
Damn. That's a shame, personally I only like Nyo Itacest... It's caliente.  
Sai-Sai: Yay for questions! It's question time again!  
Al: Si... 1. Since you are a virgin this question is only hypothetical... Would you rather fuck guys or girls?  
Sai-Sai: 2. Can you plz tells us a bit about male Belgium and fem Netherlands? :3  
Al: And finally, because there are worse things that I could spam you with than even Germancest... A dare... But since I'm a nice guy I'll give you a choice. *Evil glint in eye* I dare YOU to either; kiss Veneziana (Just kiss), or... KISS THE POTATO BITCH! Accept or face the wrath of my porn collection**__._

You're not welcome. And . . . that's er, nice . . .

_Hm? Me and Germany only sleep together. What's the big deal, vee? :D Nyo!Itacest? Sorella, what's that?_

N-Nothing, Feli! Just, uh . . . nothing . . . How is it _'caliente'_?! It is not _'caliente'_ in any way! Wait, why aren't you allowed to have barbies . . .? Taxidermy!? You people are insane!

_Ve~ I think those bunnies look cute! :D *Doesn't know they're . . . taxidermy bunnies*_

1. W-what!? I . . . I can't choose um . . . can't I choose both . . .?

2. Whatever. Well Male!Belgium . . . I used to have a crush on that guy. I mean, he was and is pretty cute, and he's way taller than me . . . every time I stand next to him, I feel so short . . . . If didn't have a crush on a certain someone, I would go for that (Don't fucking tell him I said that!). Fem!Netherlands . . . Well, she's kinda scary, and for some reason, Spain and her HATE each other. But she and I get along pretty well . . . Even though _Spagna_ doesn't like it when I hang out with her.

3. WHAT!? I CAN'T DO THAT! I . . . I HAVE PRIDE, DAMMIT!

. . .

F-Fine . . . But ONLY because I don't want to see any of that _'Germancest'_ stuff. F-Feli . . . *blushes*

_Hm? _

Mi dispiace . . . *Lovina slowly moves towards Feli and kisses her, gently. Felicia is shocked for a few moments, not moving, until she lets out a little soft moan. That's when Lovina pulls back, and looks back at the computer, refusing to glance at her sister*

C-Chi . . . gi . . . I hope y-you're happy . . .

_Sorella?_

*ignores, still blushing*

Dammit . . .

_**Ciao, Lovina!  
I understand why you get so angry all the time, having to look after Feli must be hard (I know- I'm always keeping an eye on my little brother England!)  
If you want a holiday, you should come to my country. Wales is nice this time of year (well, there's not too much rain...) -;  
1) what do you think of Nyo!England? Did I raise her well?  
2) will you and Feli be my friends? (not many other nations know who I am...) TT_TT  
See you!**_

Ciao.

_. . ._

Si, looking after Feli, *glances at her sister worriedly* is really hard. I have to constantly keep my eye on the idiot at all times, before she does something stupid.

Hmm. I'll think about it. Maybe it'll give me some time to get away from these other stupid countries.

1) Nyo!England and I get along well. We do argue . . . But not as much as we do with other countries. I think she's an okay girl. You did well, I guess.

2) I guess we could . . . Feli . . .?

_Sure~ *forgot about before*_

And my idiot sister is back. -_-"

_Arrevederci! :D_

_**Comment from- Fem!Spain (ChurrosSun)**_

_**Aw, Lovi, you look like a tomate! So adorable! *squeals***_

**_Yay! Lovi's coming over I can't wait! We'll have lots of fun right? *grins and hugs*_**

**_-Carmen Fernandez-Carriedo_**

N-No I don't! Stupid . . . And for the last time, I'm not adorable, dammit! I'm SEXY!

*hesitantly hugs back and blushes* _Si_, whatever . . . But it's not because I WANT to, _capisce_?

* * *

**Please, don't dare me to kiss anyone else EVER AGAIN. Shit . . .**

_**Oh, so it was a dare! No wonder! :D**_

**-Lovina Chiara Vargas / South Italia Romana.**


	17. Chapter 17: Soon After Valentine's Day

**((For the next few chappies (After this one), Lovi is gonna be all OOC! That means she's gonna go 2p. Yup. All nice and stuffs. This'll be interesting. :D))**

_**Felice festa di San Valentino. **_

**Yeah, it's very late. I know. I was . . . busy.**

**For all of you that want to know, I spent my Valentine's at Carmen's place. N-Not because we're in l-l-love or anything, just because Valentine's Day is a day of love AND ****friendship****, so we spent it as F-FRIENDS.**

**Just friends.**

**((Friends with benefits? :D))**

**NO.**

**FRIENDS.**

**Capisce? **

**Anyway.**

**I'm going to kill Hungary.**

**And I mean Nyo! Hungary.**

**That fucking bastard supposedly spotted me and Feli . . . k-kissing yesterday, and took fucking pictures of it.**

**I swear if that bastard shows them to anyone, his face is going to go through a little 'repairing' . . . starring my fist. And maybe a kick too, because I don't wear heels just to look sexy. (Even more than I already do, anyway.)**

* * *

_**Comment from- Wales (Vocabelle8aph): **_

_**Bore da! It's Wales again!  
Yes, yes, yes! Lovi is my friend! That'll teach Scotland for picking on me. I'm just too small to fight back. :(  
I heard an interesting rumour from England that you and a certain Spaniard have feelings for each other... Could these be true? Heh, heh, heh... e_e  
And by the way it's n- not true at all that I like Scotland. No way... O/O  
Are you going to the party at Prussia's place? I hope I can see you there (I'm sure there's gonna be a whole lot of beer... -_-")**_

Ciao, Wales.

Scotland picks on you? Ugh, you're not the only one. That bastard is so annoying sometimes . . .

. . . .

NO! NO, NO, N-NO! Me and that stupid bastard do NOT have feelings for each other! Wait, do you mean the tomato bastard, or the tomato bitch (Nyo!Spain). N-NOT THAT IT WOULD MATTER A-ANYWAY! ASDFGHJKL;$#wr%^& ! Where the hell is that British asshole . . . ?

Hm? If you say so . . . I mean, even if Scotland's a bastard, he's not bad looking . . . You should go for that. Well, IF you do like him.

Hmm, maybe. And beer? Psh, I'm going to bring wine. If I'm going to get drunk, might as well be classy about it. *Shoves 3 bottles of wine into purse*

_**Comment from- Sweden (DerpAThon):**_

_**Hello South Italy,**_

**_Not really. We're stuck with our siblings, as annoying as the may be._**

**_It negatively impacts children to be taught to think like that._**

**_I know what you mean. I was considered an odd child too because of my refusal to fight. Then they stopped making me fight because it became evident that I couldn't see my opponent._**

**_If I really wanted to, I could probably beat the shit out of everyone who wrongs me. But I don't. I don't even fight back. Some people have really ridiculous fears. Like the fear of paper._**

**_The sparkly vampire puts her in a lot of danger and leaves her repeatedly. And he's super violent. He's like if you fed Mathias glitter and then made him mad._**

**_I'm dragged against my will. They all get drunk. They're scary drunks. Tino usually comes just because he loves alcohol. I remember watching them as they drunkenly played some horror game. They were laughing hysterically as they severed people in half. O_o_**

**_Yes, all of THEM combined. You know how Russia is practically bipolar? So is my 2P._**

**_I have terrible luck. I always have. Thanks, but that's not necessary. He talked himself out._**

**_My boss turned me into a workaholic. He never gives me vacation time and sometimes I have to pull all nighters. I have a TON of paperwork to do. I have my own, and I double-check Mathias' to make sure he doesn't make any budget mistakes._**

**_Thanks, I'll need it._**

**_-Sweden_**

Ain't that the truth . . . *sigh*

It's really fucking stupid how they treat people who are not "normal" whatever the hell normal is, anyway . . .

Si, I think you could. You're a really buff guy. Fear of paper!? . . . . You learn something new everyday. I'm actually a bit scared of thunderstorms . . . I don't really know why . . . They just scare the shit out of me. It's stupid, I know.

I swear, American Literature these days . . . *sigh* (Great, now I sound like England) . . . Glitter . . .? . . . Damn, I never actually really talked to Denmark that much, but he sounds like a rather . . . strange guy.

_Mio Dio_ . . . That's EXACTLY how I feel when the Bad Touch Trio drags me to bars and stuff. They're all insane drunks, I swear . . . S-Sever people in HALF? What kind of game were they playing!? _Gesu Cristo_ . . . How come us countries have to go through the fucking weirdest things?

O_O Um . . . That's just . . . fucking horrible. Damn, it must be like Carmen when she starts PMSing. One moment she's happy as usual, next thing you know, she's gone batshit crazy. Is that how your 2p acts?

I always have the shittiest luck too. No matter what, it always feels like everything bad happens to me while everyone else is having a good ass time. But whatever. I've gotten used to it already.

I have to pull all nighters sometimes too! That's usually why I take siestas in the daytime. I do mine and Feli's paperwork, since the little idiot can never focus on something for too long. And I don't usually go to the world meetings, since Feli's considered to be Italy and all that.

_**Comment from- AKA Andre:**_

_**Al: *Clutching nosebleed* Sai... /Please say that you were filming that!/  
Sai: O.o Hai! Of course I was nii-chan! _ *Waves camcorder around*  
Al: Insane...? Yeah, just wait until you meet our sister.  
Sai: One-chan is the bestest! :3  
Al: I'm actually kind of disappointed that you didn't kiss the potato bitch now... Her reaction would've been priceless! It'd have been fun to tell Sadik over drinks.  
Sai: Q-Q Sai-Sai thought that nii-chan said he'd stop getting drunk with that scary old Turkish man...!  
Al: Tsch! Yeah, and you told me that you'd stop talking to paedophiles like France...  
Sai: D: /But Franny-kun is my friend!/  
Al: *Raises eyebrow* Do you want me to go tell Francine that it's okay for her to stick her boobs in your face again...?  
Sai: QoQ NO! /Not the boobs!/ Anything but the boobs, boobs are icky...!  
Al: Anyway... On to questions. 1. Speaking of boobs, what do you think of Carmen's?  
Sai: Q-Q *Still horrified by the thought of boobs* 2. Are you scared by Francine-san too...?  
Al: 3. What's your favourite Italian swear? Personally mine is cazzo, since it can mean both fuck and cock.**_

Y-You FILMED IT!? Shit . . . Please tell me you aren't going to show that to anyone . . . I swear you're just like Nyo!Hungary . . .

S-Sister!? . . . Oh _Dio_ . . .

I will NEVER kiss that fucking potato bitch!1!1 _Mio Dio_, don't tell me you told Sadik about me and Feli . . .?

Your brother talks to France too? It's the same thing with Feli, she doesn't realize that he's a damn pervert.

Ugh! That stupid wine _cagna_ did that!?

1) *blushes* **CHIGI~!** . . . . . . . I-I . . . t-think . . . uh, I DON'T K-KNOW! Don't ask me q-questions like that, dammit! You're just like Nyo!Hungary . . .

2)Yes! I hate when her and that Prussian bitch visit! Those two are so creepy . . . I still remember when I woke up from my usual siesta, and the first thing I saw was

3) Hm . . . Damn, I can't choose only one . . . Well, if I had to choose, it would be a tie between puttana, testa di merda, bastardo and vaffanculo. Which basically mean bitch, shithead, bastard and fuck off (literally go and take it in your ass). Shit, it's hard to choose.

_**Comment from- Kurokawa chan:**_

_***Looks at some of the stupid things that her brothers (Al and Sai) have said*  
/Honestly...?/ -_-' I'm not that bad! And Sai's not allowed Barbies because he mangles them...  
*Looks at Yuri and starts nosebleeding* Unf!  
Uhm... *Awkward cough* Anyway, I guess I have some more sensible questions than my idiot brothers.  
1. How are you're relations with the rest of the NyoBTT, apart from Carmen?  
2. Why do you hate Monika (Germany) and Sophia (Austria) so much...?  
3. What do you think of Daniel Hedervary (Hungary)?  
4. Have you ever met Spain's older sibling, Portugal (Nyo or regular)?  
5. What do you think of Iggyko...?  
6. Is there any food that you like better than pasta or pizza?**_

M-Mangles . . .!?

I probably shouldn't be surprised anymore . . . *sighs*

. . . You don't seem that bad so far . . . You actually asked some of the most sensible questions on this damn blog.

. . . What is up with this yuri thing!?

1) Well, Nyo! France . . . She's not really a pervert, she's just . . . really, REALLY affectionate. Don't tell her I said that. She can actually give really good advice sometimes, and she's pretty reliable . . . Oh Dio, I can't believe I'm saying this about that _puttana_ . . . She's honestly not that bad, just doesn't understand the fucking concept of personal space sometimes. Way better than that wine bastard Francis. At least in my opinion. So . . . I think we're sort of . . . aquaintances, in a weird kind of way . . .

Now, Fem! Prussia . . . She can be . . . a little bitch at times . . . b

2) I hate Fem! Germany because . . . Well, I don't really hate the bitch, I just DISLIKE her is all. And i-it's because . . . *blushes* Feli hardly spends time with me anymore, and she spends time with her a lot more than me . . . *sighs* I know, it's _stupido_.

. . . Sometimes, I really hate how honest I am in these blog posts.

Now, Fem! Austria . . . I hate that bitch. She's just . . . too uptight and snobby that it makes me want to fucking slap the nearest person!11!1! She can be alright sometimes, don't get me wrong, but other times . . . she can just be annoying as fuck.

3) _OH DIO._ THAT STALKER.

Just today, I found a tiny ass microphone or whatever the hell it was in my hair. And then I found like 20 fucking cameras all over my house. What the fuck!? He keeps on implying that me and the tomato bitch are in a relationship, but we're N-NOT!

*looks next to laptop*

Fan-fucking-tastic, here's yet another one of those little cameras! _Cazzo_!

That guy and his obsession with yuri . . .

Japan, you've created a monster.

4) I've met Nyo! Portugal, and I actually quite like her. She's actually alright. She and I have spoken on various occasions when she would randomly visit Carmen, and we actually have a lot of things in common.

And . . . I think this is the first time I haven't cursed while talking about someone.

Damn.

5) Me and the scone bitch have a 'frenemies' sort of thing. Sometimes, we get along rather fucking well. And then, next thing you know, we get into a fight like those sloppy bitches at the club. She can be rather . . . annoying at times . . . I honestly get along better with Canako. But she's one of the sanest nations out there. And that's saying something, when you're surrounded by freaking idiots.

6) Well, I actually rather love sweets . . . Especially cookies. Sometimes, when me and Feli spend hang out, we make these Sicilian cookies called _Cuccidati_. They're basically cookies with fig filling and an orange glaze. Those are my favorites.

_**Comment from- Prussia (xXxXLupicideXxXx):  
Kesesese!  
*Takes pic of the Itacest on phone camera and starts messaging it to the rest of the BTT*  
/Payback for implying such unawesome things fraulein!/ Kesesese!  
*Starts singing badly off key*  
Lovi und Carmen, sitting in ein tree!  
K-I-S-S-I-N-G! ;D**_

Bastardo Tedesco! (German bastard!) I will sic the fucking Mafia on you! You better keep your eyes open at night, dammit!

*head keyboard* bwufb7&*b8rg%$#dcrwtef

Stop singing. Please. My ears are fucking bleeding!

S-SHUT UP! ME AND CARMEN ARE FRIENDS!11!1! W-We're not together! AT. ALLLLLLL.

_**Comment from- crazy YingYang writer7: **_

_**It's crazyYingYangwriter7, my idiotic twin brother still has my f****** laptop and I don't know what he did with it! So I still can't sign up to type up what I wanted or look for stuff like I wanted to. * mutters curse words at brother* Here goes my questions: What would do if someone would date Spain? Have you come to find some strange laws when going to other countries? how can you keep yourself from not killing people, like France or maybe even Prussia? Cause my siblings fight like how some of the countries at meetings. . . *even though I love them* it's kind of frustrating to keep them from fighting all the damn time. How is it going with you and Spain doing, did you confess you feelings to the one you're in love with? *looks at you innocently while ignoring twin brother lecturing me that I'm a coward for confessing my feelings for a certain someone* Have you seen Seborga lately? If given the choice of being locked in a closet with Spain or not eating tomatoes for two weeks, which would you choose? Will you hug Spain if someone paid you or will you hug Spain willingly?(either fem/male would do). Why do you always call Spain a jerk? Oh, I'm sending you two large creates of delicious tomatoes to you, I planted them myself! *ignores twin brothers whines of not getting the first batch of tomatoes* and I also send another create to you to help you get away from annoying people for a while. Hope it helps and hope your V-day is good. Now time for me to do my job as the oldest sibling try to tell brother crush that he needs to ask my brother himself to ask him to be his bf. *yaoi fan girl smile comes on* I ask you more questions later. *slowly approaches twin brother with a plan in mind***_

Ciao.

I-If someone were to date S-Spain!? I . . . I w-wouldn't mind . . . *frowning and blushing* That bastard can d-date whomever he likes . . . ! I w-wouldn't give a d-damn . . .

HELL YES! I'll tell you a few. In Germany for example, there's this law in a certain highway that you are NOT allowed to pull over there, no matter what happens, or you'll be arrested. I was almost arrested there once, but me and Feli only pulled over because Feli was driving and there was NO WAY in hell I was going to let her drive on some dangerous ass road. Bitch please. Also, in Singapore, you're not allowed to chew gum or something because the government wants to keep the city clean. In Italy though, you CANNOT feed the pigeons, or you'll get arrested/fined. There's already enough pigeon shit around here, we DEFINITELY don't want anymore.

*sigh* I'm not sure. They annoy the hell out of me, yes, but sometimes, they can actually be nice people. *hopes that they're not reading this* I just remind myself that they're _Spagna's _idiot friends, and that I'll just punch the hell outta them if they bother me. *shrugs* Hey, I'm not called Romana-san for nothing. I'm someone that needs to be respected.

*sighs again* Trust me, I know how frustrating siblings can be.

M-Me and _Spagna_ are doing fine . . . And, uh . . . *blush* n-no, I didn't confess. P-Probably doesn't like me back anyway . . .

I actually just saw (Fem!) Seborga earlier today . . . That annoying little twerp.

Damn. It. Um . . . I w-would have to c-choose . . . B-Being in a closet with Spain. NOT because I WANT to, but because I NEED _mie pomodori._ (My tomatoes.) _Si_ . . .

Well, I would h-hug (Fem!) Spain if s-someone p-paid me! Not willingly . . . ! . . . Okay, MAYBE willingly.

MAYBE.

I call Spain a jerk because . . . Well . . . _Spagna_ IS a jerk! (Idon'tknowwhyactually.)

_Grazie_. I was actually running low . . . *takes both crates*

Yaoi . . .?

*shakes head* I probably don't want to know.

**_Comment from- Vampchick2010:_**

**_Hiya Lovi, _**

**_Sorry been bussy with schoolwork lately. College isn't a piece of cake. _**

**_Anyway, What kind of schooling do you get as countries? _**

**_How do you know when you love someone verses having a simple crush? I am just curious._**

**_Wow, to avoid germancest you kissed feli? Hmm, that how interesting. I personally like germancest. especially with prussia as the uke. hehe. don't tell him i said that._**

**_Arrevederci!_**

_Ciao_.

It's fine. And I understand.

Well, as countries . . . Well, we go to this school in this secret location, and people usually call it Gakuen Hetalia or something . . . We usually go there for schooling and stuff. Our major subjects are History, Economics, Law and Geography.

Well, when you love someone . . . *blush* It's like . . . you can't imagine living life without them. Someone you would be willing to risk your own life for. The person you love has to make you feel special and one of a kind. A simple crush is just something temporary, a simple attraction you may have to someone. I know my stuff, Italy is the country of _amore_ after all. Ignore that bullshit people tell you about France being the country of _amour_ and bla, bla, bla . . .

Y-Yeah . . . I mean, seeing two potato bastards doing . . . that s-stuff is NOT my cup of tea. *shudders* And it will never be. Prussia as uke? What's a uke? Fem!Japan said something about me like that . . . And I won't.

**_Comment from- Uddevalla (Fellepelle):_**

**_Hello, Lovina!_**  
**_First, you are awesome and a big role model to me._**  
**_My question is; Can you tell me a bit more about your Beautiful country?_**  
**_I plan on going there when I get some free time._**  
**_Paperwork is the most annoying thing ever..._**  
**_Ha en trevlig dag! (have a nice__ day)_**

Bene. I'm must be a damn good role model for people. *smug smirk*

Well . . . Italia. The country of _Amore_ and beauty. Definitely a place to think about if you ever got to Europe. The people are nice and charismatic, and we have great hospitality and food. Our culture comes from a mix of others, including Spain, Saudi Arabia and many other countries. Our foods mostly contain tomatoes of course, pasta or cheese. Bah, I'm not good at descriptions . . . But, we also have some nice beaches, restaurants, hotels, and many other wonderful sights and stuff . . .

Paperwork is shit. Period.

Arrevederci.

**_Comment from- Fem!Spain:_**

_**Loovi Remember Valentine's Day! ;) That was very . . . very fun! *giggles* I hope we can do that again sometime! *winks* **_

_**Did you get the present I sent you yet? I hope you like it! ;D**_

_**-Carmen/ Fem! Spain**_

_S-Si_, I remember . . . *blush* CHIGI! S-S-SHUT UP! Don't talk a-about it! No one is supposed to know. And no, we won't do that again! *blushes darker, and pouts*

Okay, maybe.

I said MAYBE.

Anyway, _si_, I got the fucking teddy bear. It's . . . c-cute . . . _Grazie_ . . .

P.S: Did you . . . d-did you get the . . . the . . . carnationsIsentyou?

* * *

**As always, the comments were . . . *blushes* interesting . . . *yawns* . . . Damn I'm fucking tired . . . Me and Carmen sure- I MEAN, I s-sure did a lot of paperwork today! H-Heh . . . Ah, fuck. **

**-Lovina Chiara Vargas / South Italia Romana.**


	18. Chapter 18: Confessions and BDSM

**((Sorry for late update! ;-; I've been busy...)**

**Ciao, everyone...**

**I bet you're wondering why I haven't updated this blog in so damn long... **

**Well.**

**Something happened yesterday.**

**I... I confessed to Carmen...**

**...**

**And then I ran away.**

**BEFORE you fuckers say anything, look, it is NOT easy to confess to another person! Damn, I was all shaky and shit... And I'm sure Carmen doesn't like me back, I mean, how could someone like her like someone like ****_me_****? She's all cheerful and shit, while I'm just grumpy Southern Italy. Not EVEN Southern Italy, I'm the grumpy Romana. Yup.**

**Now, I'm currently hiding from the tomato bitch in my room back at my house, and I'm just super stressed right now... Especially since Felicia is sick, which means I'm going to the next world meeting! Why do I have the worst fucking luck in the damn world...!?**

**So I'm going to see Carmen there.**

**And it's going to be awkward as fuuuuck.**

**Dammit.**

* * *

_**Comment from- Kunikohime Madoka Tanuki:**_

_**white day is 6 days away. what did u get every year? do u ever crossdressing as Lovino?**_

By White Day, I'm guessing you mean Valentine's Day, so... I don't really get a lot of gifts every year... A lot of the nations don't like me, so... *shrugs* I usually get some flowers, chocolates and/or stuffed animals from Carmen... Though she gets those for everyone. And I get some stuff from Canada and _mia sorella_.

And psh, hell no! I mean, my counterpart is sexy (He IS my counterpart after all) but there's no need for me to cross dress as him. Though I did catch him trying on my uniform once... Eh, he must've been drunk. *shrugs*

**_Comment from-Sweden (And I'm Javert)_**

**_Hello South Italy, _**

**_Yup._**

Unfortunately. People claim they want to help, but instead of wanting special snowflake cookies for helping, why don't they do something that actually helps like volunteering or educating?

Mathias is scared of nature, so bringing one of Australia's poisonous spiders home does the trick. He's lucky I don't reciprocate what he does to me.

How sad. And to think books like "the Jungle" used to be published. Now all that's published is teen trash that authors will be ashamed of later.

Last time they tried to drag me to a bar I left claw marks in the floor. My nails aren't even sharp or long. Yup yup. I think it was Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

Pretty much, only more fashion and hair obsessed. It's not THAT bad, but I suppose I am rather tolerant...I have tranquilizer darts if he tries anything.

It seems like whenever my life is finally looking up, something terrible happens. Thank you depression for draining what little self-confidence I had in the first place. Thank you colleagues and fellow Nordics for making my life a living hell.

The only problem with that is eventually my body just passes out from lack of sleep. My king is cool but my Prime Minister is kind of annoying. I wish he would stop asking me unnecessarily invasive questions about my personal

** life.**

-Sweden

EXACTLY! Like some really rich celebrities! I mean it's nice that you make a whole damn speech about how the people have to stay strong and all that crap, but what about actually making an effort of helping out by donating some of your fucking money! Ugh I swear, things were so much more simple back then. For example, back then, a lot of people that were policemen did it because it was something they _enjoyed_. Now, they only do it because of the benefits and advantages they get for being a policeman.

*laughs* I can kind of imagine his face when he sees those... I actually have a bit of arachnophobia, and I know it scares the _shit _outta me when I see those. *shudders*

_YES! _Back then, there were more books that actually educated people about what goes on around us. But now, there's so many books that either are just complete bullshit, extremely cliché, are just authors writing down their fantasies (sexual or not), or both. I feel a teeny tiny bit bad for Stephanie Meyer. But hey, she brought that upon herself.

What also gets me mad is how easy it is to get famous these days... People that have absolutely NO talent can get famous just for recording a video of themselves falling off the roof of their house or doing some crazy stunt like that, or for just rapping. And the people that work so hard to get known don't! So aggravating, I swear...

_Dio mio... _T-Texas Chainsaw Massacre!? I remember the albino bitch dragged me to see ... that. *shudders* NEVER AGAIN.

My 2p is more fashion obsessed than me too, even though I am pretty obsessed with fashion already. Tranquilizer dart... Huh, I usually just knock out mine with a lamp, or anything heavy or I just get France to drag her away and the two usually go shopping or whatever. *shrugs* I don't really have much patience for people...

THAT IS EXACTLY HOW I FEEL! Life is just a cruel, cruel bitch sometimes, I swear. No matter how much I try to convince myself, I'm not as confident as I once was. *sighs*

My boss is just... strange. He asks EXTREMELY invasive questions about my personal life too. VERY invasive questions...

_Arrevederci_, Sweden.

**_Comment from- Fem! Wales (VocabelleAph8): _**

**_For the record, I meant Carmen! I know I'm treading on dangerous ground saying this, but if you like her you should confess! You only live once, and isn't Italy the country of amore? 0_**

**_T-there's no way I could get together with that jerk! He's just another stupid useless idiot. I tell you, if this was back in the good old days (Celtic!Wales), I would have beat him to a pulp, but I'm not a strong country anymore. _**

**_I have had a lot of conflict with my siblings, do you get along with your family/ surrounding countries? Would you forgive them if they fought you now? _**

**_Also, did you get a lot of sexism towards you in the past? Being a female nation can be hard, especially when your entire country thinks that girls can't do a guy's job!_**

**_Well, I suppose that's all for now. And I caught Fem!England laughing at a certain picture that was taken of you at Prussia's party. Well, no one can blame you, you were quite drunk..._**

**_Hwyl Fawr!_**

VSASDUYV6545^%%WEUQ I did... Fuuuuuckk my life. Of course, _Italia_ is the country of _amore_! Don't listen to what France or Spain say. Italy is the country of love, and that's that.

Come on, it's obvious you have a thing for him. *crosses arms over chest* Seriously, people and denial these days... *is being a hypocrite* I wish I could beat a bunch of nations to a pulp too... I'm not as strong as I was before either.

I do get along with Feli, and Seborga, but me and Feli do argue sometimes. If we fought now... I would forgive them;. I learned from WII... And I can't let anything separate me and my siblings ever again. Let me tell you... After WII I went to see Feli. When I got to her doorstep, I was worried. Mostly because I wasn't sure if she was still angry at me... She opened the door, and she started crying before she hugged me. I... I cried too... And then I realized that no matter what happens, we are _famiglia_. Sorry for that sappy bit by the way...

I did! Our bosses would always make the decisions for us, and... A LOT of things happened to female countries back then... There are some incidents in which a female country was raped and stuff, and it was pretty hard. I especially got bullshit from the Mafia for being a girl and crap. But thank God everything's fine now.

WAIT! I need to know what happened! I heard I lap danced someone, but I don't remember who... Dammit.

_Arrevederci_, Wales.

**_Comment from-Prussia (xXxXLupicideXxXx):_**

**_Hmmm... NEIN! *Continues singing horribly and following Romana around*_**

AARRGH! Stooop. *gets frying pan, and swings around threatiningly* I'm not afraid to fucking use this!

**_Comment from-AKA Andre:_**

**_Al: *Laughing maniacally* Nope, we won't jut go showing it to random people. We filmed it for our Sister's birthday present.  
Sai: *Giggles* But Sai-Sai knows that Franny-kun is a pervy, silly Lovi-chan! :3  
Al: *Glares at Sai* Yeah, he actually /encourages/ the groping...  
Sai: *Smiles innocently* But it's so much fuuuuunnnn!  
Al: *Sighs in exasperation* Hell yeah I told Sadik. Do you think that I have no social life or something...?  
Sai: *Notices Prussia singing and joins in*  
Al: Okay, just one question... Why are Carmen's Spanish flag panties dangling off of one of Daniel's cameras? ...Not that I would happen to have a link to the feed from Sadik drunkenly stealing his stuff or anything like that._**

Oh God... And he encourages the...? You know what, I'm already starting to get used to all you weird people... But still... o.o

No, I just didn't think you would tell him! Y-You didn't tell anyone else r-right?

AAGGHHH! NOOO! *covers ears*

Spanish flag panties...? *eyes widen* OH. Shitttt. Um, er... *blushes* Well, during Valentine's... I was drunk, and C-Carmen was drunk too, I think, and we... kinda... did... Uh... Y-You know what I mean! *blushes harder* Chigi...

WAIT.

*shouts in rage* I'M GOING TO KILL YOU DANIEL HERDEVARY! *shakes fist* I thought I deactivated all of the cameras, dammit!

I'm sure it was only a one time thing though!

**_Comment from- Kurokawa chan:_**

**_*Pouts* Yuri's not that bad...  
*Smirking evilly* Anyway, can you help me pick which drawing is better? *Holds up a pic of BDSM Germano and a pic of BDSM Germana* They were just sooo cute and I couldn't decide which one! *Innocent cutesy face*_**

Yes, yes it is-

AHHHH! MY EYES. WHYYY. *closes eyes* That is not cute! That is disgusting! FUCK! I pick that one! *tries to point to BDSM Germano, but accidentally points to BDSM Germana because she has eyes closed* I AM OFFICIALLY SCARRED. And here I was starting to think you were sane... *shudders*

* * *

**That... That was interesting. (As always.) **

**Well, arrevederci everyone. Until next time...**

**OHDIOMIO I THINK I HEAR CARMEN DOWNSTAIRS *goes to room lock door* SHIT, SHIT, SHIT!**

******-Lovina Chiara Vargas / South Italia Romana.**


End file.
